I (38F) have been married to my wife (33F) since 2018. I am an extrovert and love to entertain. She is an introvert and a homebody but we anyways made it work. We bought our house together in 2016 and while she put slightly more in for the down payment, I more than made up for it in renovations. We split everything else 50/50. Our rule for entertaining was no work nights and limited randos. Tonight I went to our local karaoke place and ran into two good friends of ours (also gay) a gal we both know and my friend from poker, James, that she also knows. I texted her to let her know that Karaoke got over early and we were coming over to make a fire and hang out. She didn’t answer because she was already in bed. James and I got there first and I heard her yelling in our room so I went to tell her everything was alright and saw she had the gun safe out trying to punch in the code and just looked at me while still unlocking it and said that “no one was allowed in HER HOUSE” I explained to her that it was James and our other friends and I had texted her and that we would be outside and quiet and she just looked me in the eyes and said she didn’t care and continued punching the code into the gun safe. I tried to calm her down but she was unreasonable so I just left the room. James heard the whole thing and felt very uncomfortable and asked if he should leave but I said, no, we’d be fine, and it’s my house too, but the truth is I’m shattered. She used a deadly weapon as a prop to threaten me. I even asked her if she had been drinking or something though I knew she hadn’t. When I confronted her an hour later after our friends left she tried to change the story to say that she only had the gun safe out when she didn’t know who was in the house but that made me angrier because I told her I had explained to her that invited guests were there and she knew them and she still persisted in trying to unlock the safe while staring me down which she admitted to. I see her in a different light and i’m heartbroken. I’m sleeping in another room and demanding counseling. AITAH?