So I (39F) have a daughter (15F) from a previous marriage. Her dad and I split when she was 5 after he cheated on me with his now wife. Messy, yeah, but I’ve always kept it civil for my daughter’s sake.

I’ve been the main parent, doctor visits, school stuff, everything. Her dad sees her like once a month, and when he does, it’s all Disneyland dad vibes. No rules, just vibes and gifts.

Anyway, I was planning a huge Sweet 16 for her. Like thousands of dollars, caterer, DJ, venue, the whole thing. She’s been hyped for months.

Then last weekend, we were at her dad’s house for some brunch thing his wife threw. I only went because my daughter asked me to. At some point, someone jokes about how much she looks like her dad, and she goes:

“Yeah, guess I got lucky. Especially since she’s not even my real mom.” And points to me.

Everyone laughed.

Her dad laughed. His wife laughed. Even her grandparents laughed.

I just sat there like… what?

I quietly told her we’d talk later, and we did. I asked her what the hell that was about. She said it was just a joke. That it was funny. That I needed to lighten up.

I told her, “Cool. Then I guess you don’t need me to throw you a party, since I’m not really your mom anyway.”

She thought I was bluffing. I wasn’t.

I canceled everything. No venue. No dress. No photographer. I told her she can ask her real parents for a party.

Now everyone’s saying I went too far. Her dad’s calling me bitter. His wife had the nerve to DM me and say I’m emotionally punishing my daughter. Even my sister thinks I should’ve just grounded her or something instead.

But I’m sorry, you humiliate me in front of people who disrespected me for years, and then act like I’m the one in the wrong? Nah.

AITAH for canceling her party over what she claims was just a “joke”? Or did she finally cross the line?