I have a long distance friend(22M), part of a very close-knit group in another state, we'll call him Kevin, who is at a very low point in his life, but even beyond that has a lot of red flags including but not limited to alcohol abuse, anger issues, casual use of slurs (hes a straight cis white man), would fuck any woman with a pulse, fresh out of a relationship and recently he fucked a close friend of his that his best friend was talking to for months, then cut her off and declared he hates her and it was a mistake etc. So one day i told him that my friends are off-limits. Not only for my friend's sake, but because it would ruin my friendship with Kevin once things go south, and they would. He PROMISED me and said he respected me and our friendship too much to go after any of my friends... Kevin, and the rest of the friend group and I often play video games together, and my best friend of 6 years, Amy(21F), sometimes would join us and quickly became part of the group. Kevin and Amy were friendly and goofy, but nothing outside of friendship, plus Kevin promised me, and everyone knows how deeply i care about promises. So i had no worries. Fast forward 3 weeks to when the friend group comes to visit, Kevin and Amy met, and very quickly it was as if everyone else was on the back burner, they drank a lot and got high together a handful times in the 2 DAYS they were around each other. The rest of the group is always sober. They bonded over that, and their love for country music, but nothing deeper than that. I know, bc i asked. Kevin leaves our state before the rest of the group because he had work, and my bf and i are feeling a little hurt that this trip we were excited for didn't really include as much of Kevin spending time with us as all of his focus was on Amy. After I processed what was going on i texted Amy. She said she did in fact have feelings for Kevin. What i didn't know was Kevin told her right before they met, that they could never be anything more than friends bc he made a promise to me. Amy knew this, and still pursued him knowing he'd be breaking his promise to me, and how much i value promises. There was a moment where she could have decided to either pursue things with Kevin, a man she hardly knew, who was my close friend and knew of his promise to me, or to think of how it would effect not just me but all of our friends involved and shut it down... and she just didn't care. I tell Amy i feel hurt by this, and that Kevin is a huge flirt and needs a lot of work on himself, but she wont listen. I tell her that it would ruin my friendship with Kevin, but she says shes "sorry it's not ideal" for me but wants to see where it goes, and i knew she genuinely did not care... i feel its important to say Amy has a history of not taking in the feelings of the people around her when there's men involved. She was the maid of honor at our best friend's wedding, and during the first dances where she was supposed to be recording videos and taking pictures of our besties magical day... she was playing corn hole with a group of guys. This is not the first time i've been hurt by her by being casted aside because a man was involved but thats a whole other story. And an entire month after all of this, i am the one reaching out to her, and she is radio silent. I've heard absolutely nothing from her end. I am so angry and hurt and pissed off. I feel like she never actually cared about me... i've been preparing myself to no longer have her in my life but it hurts so bad, we've been through so much but she is making absolutely no effort. Am I the asshole?