Ok so let me give you a little bit of context of what my life has been in the last quarter.

Me (25M) and my wife (24F) have been married since almost 3 years now. The entire time we've been married I never have noticed something wrong or bad until last December when we were arguing about a stupid matter.

Basically this is what happened: my parents have a recently open glasses store (where you get your prescription glasses, contact lenses and all of that)

They needed money for the rent urgently so my wife decided it was a good idea to buy her prescription glasses from them, so she went to my mother and ask her to make her a pair of prescription glasses.

So the following day my mother went ahead and ask for her previous glasses so she can take their measurements and make her a new pair.

She then went MAD but I mean really bad, she was asking me to tell them to stop making the glasses because "We didn't have the money for it", mind you, we did, the glasses where around 60 USD, we had like 1500 usd on the bank account at the moment.

I felt bad because that was the exact amount of money my parents needed to cover the rent for that month and they were counting on it.

Then wife told me to told my parents to stop making the glasses and wait until we had more money to cover the glasses but I wasn't on the mood to tell my parents AGAIN that we were not going to give them money that they need for a pair of glasses she ask for.

That's when she blew up, started crying and telling me how I'm the bad guy and that I was making her look like the bad guy again. Mind you one more time, I'm always giving the excuses to my family whenever she does stuff like this. I'm always either: too tired to go or to broke to give money, or too busy to do things with them.

So no, I never let her face her own consequences, so that's totally my fault to protect her from herself all the time.

So back to the point again, she was screaming, crying and screaming once more, I just wanted to listen to my music and sleep, I was not in the mood for another fight. But everytime I tried to just stop the arguing and sleep she pushed and pushed me into giving some sort of reaction or answer but I really was not on the mood for it that night.

So I just said: "Please let me sleep, I don't have the strength for this right now", what did she do? She throw her wedding ring at me.

That action broke me so hard that I couldn't be the same since that day.

Fast forward to today. I've been receiving therapy for almost 3 months now. I've been learning about limits and self-love. Since I've been receiving therapy wife started to take her own therapy seriously.

Her therapist told her to have more friends and expand her social circle.

So one day I'm scrolling through reddit and found a post about coffee shops in our city, essentially this was a dude from the city trying to meet new people. Then I saw a comment about a reddit user recommending to meet on a coffee shop I go with wife a lot, so I started to get suspicious.

Quick context, she has cheated on me before when we were dating 3 times, once when we first started dating, again months later with her neighbor and then on her first year of university with the first dude that show interest on her (this isn't an exaggeration, he literally was the first dude that show interest in her and she just fell for him). End of quick context.

I looked for the reddit guy's Instagram and noticed wife started following him, at that point it was weird for me that she was looking for friends on Reddit but honestly I've heard of it so I didn't care that much.

But then our of a sudden she changed her pfp to a photo with a swimsuit, mind you: she has never changed her Instagram photo, like ever, since she registered on Instagram. But then days after starting to talk with this dude she changed it.

So that's when it really started to bothering me and I was so suspicious about what were they talking about.

So a couple days ago I couldn't hold it any longer and I decided to look into her Instagram chats. I know I should've not do that and that it was violating her intimacy. But honestly she has done that too many times to me so I thought just this once I needed to know.

So I did but before reading I thought yo myself that all I needed to know was if she mentioned our marriage. If she did I would know her intentions with this dude are just friendly and we would be ok.

I started reading and reading, this dude is clearly interested in meeting her, he was sooo insisting in going to get something to drink and talk. And she was too.

The conversation wasn't in any way intimate nor wasn't cheating. But I can't shake the fact that she changed her pfp just when starting to talk with this dude and never actually mentioned that she's married.

Even though this dude is clearly interested in her.

I've already told her all about how I look into her phone but now I feel so bad about that.

And I know I'm not justified to have look into her privacy, so that's why I'm wondering Am I the asshole in this situation?