I was introduced to a man I found extremely attractive after he showed me his sense of humour playing CAH. He expressed overt interest in intimacy. I said I don’t have intimacy outside committed relationships and he then spent over 3 hours using the fact that I was ovulating and heavily intoxicated to convince me to give him a chance, then pursued me relentlessly, but saying borderline abusive things masked as “jokes” until I called him out and said “clearly you don’t value my intelligence or personality. All you do is make jokes about how I look and say vulgar things about intimacy. I told you from the jump that I only allow intimacy with men that I’m in a relationship with but you aren’t behaving like a man I’d ever want to be with tonight. I think you have an alcohol problem” and he said “and I told you I wasn’t interested in commitment”. So I said “but you still proceeded knowing I don’t permit this kind of access to me outside of a relationship and then you acted extremely interested in me for weeks, initiating texts and planning dates etc… that’s misrepresenting your intentions” “well I have no intention of being in a relationship with you”

So I said “fine.” And sent him a link to a rehab then blocked him and he immediately (like within 48 hours) took a pickmeisha with a drinking problem worse that his out of his friend zone and started bragging to the whole world on social media (which I don’t use) that this was his “girlfriend”. Now my “best friend” who introduced us is trying to convince me that because she saw us flirting before she went to sleep that I must have been ok with it. I told her she is gaslighting me. I can’t charge him with anything, nor would I want to because the line is so blurry around this whole situation… but I think that any man who is willing to cajole, beg and entice through multiple hours of a drunk woman reiterating “No” over and over is not a good person and doesn’t deserve to be given the benefit of the doubt in this situation… especially given that he said horrible things about women to me, and specifically gave my friend’s nether region and intimacy a “yelp review” saying she has an “ugly innie” that “looks like lunch meat” and she “makes weird sounds during s*x”. He also bragged about getting me to debase myself to his ex military buddies and I feel like crap. I just blocked my “friend” and told her that trying to give him the benefit of the doubt is gaslighting me and extremely upsetting and disrespectful, especially suggesting that I wanted this because SHE prefers to be promiscuous when I have a body count 13 lower than my age and hers is in the triple digits. I feel used, discarded, disrespected, manipulated and taken advantage of by BOTH of them. And I feel like it wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t been hanging out with her because that guy just assumed because we were friends that I was up for grabs, despite being told “no” in no uncertain terms repeatedly. I feel sick.