I expressed my concerns about his hygiene and appearance and he shouted at me and accused me of trying to change him for my own benefit. While I understand that he has mental issues which makes it hard to care for himself, I feel like it doesn't excuse his unwillingness to practice good hygiene and basic needs.It's gotten so bad, I'm embarrassed to go out in public with him. He says hygiene shouldn't be a priority for him and told me that if I didn't like it, I could leave. We fought about it but he eventually cooled down after I said I would take time to make sure his basic needs are met. I still have yet to tell him I'm only going to do this until it gets to the point where he can do it on his own. I am his wife, not his mother. I do understand how he might not see hygiene as a priority concerning his own mother didn't care about her appearance either. But it still doesn't excuse him throwing a tantrum and getting verbally violent with me. AITAH?