Sorry this is gonna be pretty long! Hi, I (F19) have a sister in law (F24) — my brother's wife who I feel for some reason just doesn't like me and I genuinely just wanna know why or if you feel like it's deserved. So I wanna give a rundown on SIL and how she and my brother got married, we're from a different culture so we're more into arranged marriages. SIL is my dad's best friends daughter: Also a note that my family lives in the U.S. and has lived there for a long time while SIL family lives in a different country in the Middle East. Anyway, there was talk for a while that they would get married.. A year before SIL and my brother were due to get engaged, SIL's own SIL - her brothers wife who is also American was telling me that SIL is only interested in my brother because my dad is well off etc. I shrugged it off but SIL's SIL told me that SIL has tried to get her in trouble with her MIL (SIL's mother) because what she wears etc. SIL's SIL was ranting to me pretty pissed off but I shrugged it off and said it was definitely weird but nothing I would really note. Anyways, my brother gets engaged to SIL and they really hit it off. Also note my brother is head over heels for her and honestly as his sister it's so cute to see! He would splurge on gifts such as expensive makeup, consoles, etc. To where my SIL while she was overseas would order expensive makeup and clothes etc, and when he would fly out to see her in the Middle East she wanted him to take all of those things to her. Fast forward, SIL comes to America after they have their wedding and everything. Can't lie SIL and my brother have the cutest relationship and really love each other to bits, so that's why when SIL does shady things to me which I will get into I try to ignore it seeing as they are happy together. The shady things SIL has done: * When she sees me and my other brother (not her husband) get into silly sibling arguments, she tells ME to calm down without even knowing the story or what we're even fighting about. * One time before we started living together we were just talking gossip that's happening and she ended up telling a close friend of the person that she gossiped about too what I said and the close friend told the person about what only I said and I had this person come confront me.. Also the words that I said weren't what she said close friend told her. Also when I told SIL I knew she told and I didn't appreciate that and thought I could trust her because we're family she blamed the person we gossiped about for telling me and said she's trying to tear apart our family. * One time I was looking for a Goyard bag (a used one) cause I wanted to splurge on a nice tote bag and I was telling SIL about it and she kind of was like "Haha I already have one and it's real" - brother gifted it to her (and her sister) * Pays me no attention or doesn't really go out of her way she spend time with me, but if it is my other sisters she goes out of her way to spend time with me and even with my other brother. * Makes fun of me with my siblings and says I'm over dramatic (I'm a bit sensitive) * When something happens with her I will never hear it from her I'll hear it from my siblings etc. * Told her, if she put any makeup on because her skin looks amazing and it turned out she didn't have any makeup on and her skin actually looked great.. Though when I said this she gave me a nasty look! But the worst thing probably has to be when her and my brother took an hour to pick me up in the middle of nowhere in the dark, I was scared so I called my brother and he told me that they were in the grocery store and he couldn't leave SIL alone in there and they were almost done so I would have to wait. Waited a half an hour and went into the car. Brother and SIL started guilt tripping me about how they didn't even get half the things they wanted from the store because they were rushing to pick me up - although brother told me they were almost done. I went home that day and just started crying because I truly felt no one cared about me. I feel like SIL told my brother something that makes him always run to her defense even when she is wrong. I don't understand why SIL acts like this. Also I’ve caught SIL standing outside some rooms eavesdropping while I’m on a call with my mom or sister. Here are some reasons why I think she might be treating me this way (trying to have no bias): * I’ve talked and vented to my sisters about how she treats me and certain instances I’ve had with her (I’m assuming when she eavesdropped that day) * When she first came after getting married I was kind of put off by her because of the gossip she started with the person who confronted me * My SIL and my brother sleep in a room that’s in our basement but our basement also has a pantry that has extra things for our kitchen such as pans, plates, etc. Also it has a TV room where I used to sit and watch TV on when my brother was travelling and when he was there seeing it’s a bit far from the room he used to sleep in (the room they sleep in now).. I usually go downstairs to get plates and napkins from the pantry and brother once came to me and told me to not go down to the basement because SIL thinks I’m standing by their bedroom door and eavesdropping - which I swear I never have done (very creepy and very weird and disgusting) * SIL is insistent that I don’t take any pictures of her or videos (this happened around two months after her coming after her wedding) Before it was never a problem and I’ve never ever sent her photos to anyone and usually double check before even sending to her sister.. So now she usually asks me in a weird and hostile way and I’ve done the same to her and told her to not take photos of me but then my brother chimes in and says it’s fine because I always take pictures of everyone (don’t know why he even involved himself seeing it was just between me and her) * When SIL was pregnant I used to make her food seeing as she was sick and used to clean the entire house.. She of course stays in her room in the basement due to her being sick. Once I usually am done cleaning I close the door to the basement and spray the air was febreeze and light some incense so the house smells nice (I do this because I know SIL will not be coming upstairs seeing as she’s super sick and doesn’t come upstairs for any reason) One day I did this and I had no prior knowledge she was leaving the house — she came upstairs and told me “Stop spraying the house!” I felt like I was dismissed and had no knowledge prior that she is sensitive to these smells seeing as she uses perfumes. I swear I didn’t mean any harm That is all. AITAH? Also to note: I’ve talked to my other brother about why she might feel this way and he says it’s because “i’m too nice” and it might come off to her as fake.