I don’t know if anyone saw my original post but since then I had an argument in McDonald’s which led to the loss of my son, I have zero rights to see him now and my ex wife has confirmed that I need to be 101% clean before I step close to my son again. Three days ago I came over drunk begging my ex wife to take me back and let us be a family again, all she did was drive me home and beg me to get better for our son. Since being given this news I’ve signed up for as many counselling sessions as possible, I’ve gone to the woman I knocked out and formally apologised and handed her a five pound note. My ex wife has confirmed there is another chance for our marriage as long as I continue fixing myself but it’s definitely been a struggle remembering all my past actions