Hey Reddit need an outside opinion because I’m still upset and questioning myself.

I (28F) have been married to my husband (30M) for 6 years, and we have a 4-year-old son. The issue is my MIL. She’s always had this subtle, rude attitude toward me backhanded compliments, passive-aggressive comments, little digs here and there. I’ve put up with it for years for the sake of family peace.

I’ve talked to my husband about it more times than I can count, but he always downplays it, saying things like “that’s just how she is” or “she doesn’t mean it.” He always brushes it off and expects me to do the same, but it’s exhausting.

Sunday was the breaking point. We were at her house for a small family get-together. I’d told her earlier that day that our son couldn’t have sweets because he hasn’t been feeling well, and sugar just makes it worse. A couple hours later, I find her sneaking him a giant cupcake and telling him “don’t tell Mommy.”

I calmly told her that wasn’t okay it’s not about the cupcake, it’s about respecting me as his mother and following what we’ve decided is best for our kid. She immediately got defensive and accused me of being “too uptight” and “controlling.” I finally lost it and told her I’m done with her constantly ignoring what I say and acting like it doesn’t matter.

It turned into a huge argument, she made a scene, and now she’s telling everyone I ruined the day over a piece of cake.

What makes it worse is my husband just stood there and barely said a word. Later, he told me I “overreacted” and should’ve let it go to avoid drama. I felt so alone — except for his younger sister (26F) who quietly pulled me aside and said she’s 100% on my side. She told me their mom has always been like this — disrespectful, overbearing, especially toward the women in the family, and she was honestly glad someone finally called her out.

So now here I am feeling like the villain to my husband and his mom, but also relieved that someone else in the family sees what I’ve been dealing with.

Reddit… AITAH for standing up to my MIL yesterday?