TLDR at the bottom.

I (17f) went through my brother's (14m) phone because I swear I saw one of my private pictures in his camera roll when he showed me smth once. With private pictures i don't mean anything bad, just pictures of my makeup/face/outfit I post on a private twitter account with only my closest friends and nowhere else.

It stressed me out bcs why does he have that? What is he doing with it? So I did some searching and he sends my photos to this friend of his who has a crush? On me? Im not sure but she told him to tell me about her and that she finds me attractive. She's also 14 so ofc I do not ever interact with her bcs that's super awkward?? And wrong???

I'm so upset rn. I leave my twt logged in on our shared drawing tablet so i can easily post art I draw without having to log in every time. I told him i trusted him to not do random things with my account I TOLD HIM I TRUSTED HIM. and he goes behind my back to leak my pictures AND allow her on my priv account?? I DONT EVEN LET HIM ON THERE. luckily i noticed quickly and kicked her out so i dont think she saw anything. I talk about a lot on things on there, heavy stuff as well.

After that I went through his messages with her and whike he didn't say anything bad he did out me. I'm a lesbian and I didn't give him permission to just randomly tell his friends I'm gay. I guess I implied it, but I would've really liked it if he had asked. Our parents are homophobic and would probably disown me if they knew and in public he always calls me gay as a joke depsite how i hiss at him.

But that's not the worst part he fucking told her I have mental issues, he told her I have personality disorders????? Which is true I have been diagnosed BUT I DONT GO AROUND TELLING PEOPLE THAT. I never talk about my mental health outside of therapy I told him this because i trusted him why would he tell his friend about that. What's wrong with him. I've been crying about this ever since I read the messages. As I've said i never tell anyone about my disorders because they're ruining my life and im afraid people won't like me if they know this about me.

I hate him. But he's also my brother and I care for him. We have a complicated relationship. I am the one hes closest to at home, he has a shit relationship with our parents and an even shittier relationship with our other siblings. Im the only one backing him up and in his corner. I care for him bcs hes my brother and when hes not an asshole we get along great. So i dont know why he treats me like this. He said i was the only one at home he could trust so why would he betray mine like that?

I really want to confront him about this because I need to set boundaries and tell him that this is not okay, but if he finds out I've been snooping through his phone he might hate me for all eternity. I'm fine with that, he can hate me. I'll miss him but he has every right. But I also don't want him to see home as a place where he has no one. He doesn't deserve that. He needs a sister he can trust.

That's why I'm so conflicted. I feel so guilty for going through his messages, he's a very private person: when he's texting someone he always tilts his phone away from me (rude, that he doesn't trust me to look away which I always do but wtvr I'm not offended). This is also the first time I've ever done this, going through someone's phone. I felt so much shame when I saw him just now. He doesn't know what i did.

I'm rambling. But he's so mean to me i don't know why i put up with it. He's so mean to everyone. I don't know what to do. He's just 14. He should know better, but he's also just a kid. I guess I am too.

TLDR: I snooped through my brother's messages because he has some of my pictures that I've only ever posted on a private account that he sends to his friend who has a crush on me. I have that account logged in on our shared drawing tablet and told him i trusted him to not do anything with it. Not only did he take pictures off of it but he also let her in my account. He isnt even allowed to see what i do on there. When I was snooping I saw that he not only outed me as gay to his friend, but also told her i have mental health problems. I told him those because i trusted him but he goes around telling his friend without ever asking me. I'm upset about him telling his friend and betraying my trust, not so much the pictures

I want to confront him because im upset but I fear that if i do confront him it'll shatter our relationship and he'll have no one at home who he trusts. I don't want him to be alone.