Okay, so just to clarify, I am 17F and my older sister is 19, and we both currently live with our grandparents, who we consider to be our parents since they raised us for majority of our life. Me and my sister have always sorta never got along, she used to pick on me when I was younger a lot, but only in a stereotypical sibling way. A few years back, our bio mom reached out to us while we were still living with our grandparents though and asked for us to live with her again. We ended up living with her for four years, during which me and my bio mom and stepdad did NOT get along, and in result it kind of ended up ruining me and my sister's relationship as well. A few months back, I moved back in with our grandparents, and my sister came with.

Keep in mind, when she did this, she was 18 and my grandma gave me the choice on whether or not my sister would move back in with me, and I agreed. I'm pretty sure my sister doesn't know I got this choice, but it was a 'do or don't' type of thing, so if I had said no, she would've still been with our bio mom.

Anyways, a while ago, my sister finally got her license, and our grandpa had already bought the two of us a car to share, because I have my permit, and he wants us to be able to get on the rode experience easily. In celebration, my sister decided to buy a parking pass for our school, so that she could drive to and from school every day! I encouraged this, because I was also tired of taking the bus, and she paid $25 dollars for a parking spot and started driving us to school. A few days later, as she was driving me home from work, she brought up how she wanted me to start paying her $5/week for driving me to school in the morning. I thought this was insane, and I said no, because why would I pay my sister to drive me to school, when she is driving to school anyways? Keep in mind she goes out of her way to drive her other friend to school, and she lives in a completely different neighborhood, but she isn't making her pay.

Well, I disagree, and we begin to fight over it, and when we get home, I immediately go to my grandpa and grandma to complain to them. My sister had explained how it was originally my dad's idea, since he was paying for everything, her gas, her car, insurance, and he figured I could help a bit since I have a job and my sister doesn't. Well, I go mental a bit, I'm pissed to be honest and im screaming things like, "I'm not paying for her fucking car, shes 19, she should have a job, she's not my fucking debt collector."

Which, I understand was immature of me, but in the moment, I was pissed. I ended up apologizing to my grandpa that same night for screaming at him, and we got it resolved, but my sister ended up crying over what I said, and after that night, things were just really extra tense, and I wasn't exactly talking to her.

Well, a few days later, she is driving two of our friend's home from school, and we still aren't quite talking. This is kind of normal for us, usually we get into an argument, don't talk for a few days, then go back to normal and act like nothing ever even happened. This time though, she was sitting at a turn for like 10 minutes and causing a big block in traffic behind us, so I decided to tell her she needed to go at some point, cause she's "had so many chances". She gets angry straight off the bat ad we begin to go back and forth on this for a bit, just debating on if I should've commented on her driving or not, and then as were pulling into one of our friends neighborhoods to drop him off, she calls my grandpa and says that she is "Leaving me on the side of the rode, and he is going to have to come and get me." Well he disagrees and tells her to bring me home and then hangs up. She decides she's leaving me on the side of the road anyways, and the only reason she doesn't is because i refuse, and eventually she HAS to drive me home, so she does. At this point, I've completely decided I wasn't going to talk to her, like, ever again.

That was probably a heat in the moment thing, being 17 now, I can admit I tend to be a little dramatic. Well, I go a few more days without acknowledging her at all. Then the next time I finally talk to her, after many failed attempts on her part, is when I get home from school and cook me and my grandpa spaghetti. It wasn't dinner, and I didn't make any for my grandma either, so it's not like it was targeted, but when I pass by her afterwards in the kitchen, she feels the need to say, "Real nice of you to make spaghetti for EVERYONE." I ignore her, but she goes to our grandpa to complain, and when he asks why I didn't make her any, I explain it wasn't meant to be dinner and that I used the entire box on our spaghetti. She then decides to message me a picture of two spaghetti boxes with the caption, "Just so you know where the two whole extra boxes are in the future". So, I break my vow of silence or whatever to say back, "and I still won't make them for you LOL".

She was pissed, and I do admit, again, that was very petty of me. The next time we actually talk is a week or so later when I move her bookbag over one seat, and she message me "I have my things in a specific place for a reason. Do not move them. There is a second backseat that you are perfectly capable of sitting in." and I reply back "LOL".

She went to our grandpa and said that I have been "bullying" her, and i'm actually kind of beginning to think I'm being a real bully too. I feel kind of bad, but I don't really want to talk to her, because everytime she tries to talk to ME, it's just causing arguments, and I try not to engage in them. After she went to our grandpa and said I was bullying her, she made a point to shove past me as she was walking by and it pushed me into the wall she did it with so much force. I didn't say anything, again, but she continues to insist that I am being some "bully" cause I won't talk to her. At the same time though, she goes to our bio mom, who, quite frankly, I hate with a passion, to just complain about me 24/7.

Usually though, me and her would be talking again and acting like we never even fought, and we would be bestie-bestie again. I'm just kind of unsure what to do though, because I don't want to continue to just ignore every argument like this, but I have never had a serious talk with her.

Idk, am I the asshole? Sorry if this seemed like a mindless rant by the way, it was hard to get every thought down in writing!

EDIT: Just to clarify, and i’m sorry i didn’t, I did offer to pay for any time she drives me anywhere BUT school! So to work, or to a friends, or even the store, i would pay for gas money!