I’m a woman in my sixties. I’ve been dating a man who’s also in his sixties for almost four months. Last weekend, him and his son were discussing his ex wife. Apparently, he’s still paying for some of his ex wife’s expenses. I asked him if it’s because he owes her any debt that he’s trying to pay back or if they have a codependent situation. They said it’s because of her medical bills and some of her living expenses.

He has two kids who all graduated from college and they’re all living independently. His ex wife had a job before she retired. I was told that the divorce was finalized twelve years ago and he’s not required to pay her any child support or alimony anymore.

Earlier on, he told me that his ex wife used to abuse him before the divorce happened, so I don’t know why he’s still paying for her expenses.

Last Sunday, I called him to tell him that I no longer want to date him because we aren’t meant to be together. He asked me why I don’t want to date him anymore. I told him I don’t want to get into details and I don’t want to explain why, but I wish him the best of luck. I felt that he was confused and hurt by the sound of his voice when we said goodbye to each other.

It looks like he’s never going to stop sending her money and it won’t matter how serious our relationship gets. I’m really not in the mood to discuss this issue with him because I don’t want to tell him what to do. I’ve only been dating him for four months and I’m not ok with being in a serious relationship with someone who sends any of their exes money if it isn’t child support or alimony.