so, i (22f) have a best friend, natalie (23f), who i've known since we were little. we’ve always been really close, almost like sisters, and we’re both pretty open with each other about pretty much everything. a few months ago, i came out to her as bisexual. i wasn’t planning on telling anyone else at the time, but i trusted her and felt safe doing so.

then, a few weeks ago, we were hanging out with our group of friends, and out of nowhere, natalie casually mentioned my sexuality in front of everyone. she wasn’t trying to be mean or anything — i’m sure she just forgot that i hadn’t come out to the others yet. but i was caught off guard and immediately felt uncomfortable. the group went silent, and then they started asking questions. i felt really exposed and ended up awkwardly leaving early.

i told natalie the next day that i wasn’t okay with her outing me, and i explained why it felt like a betrayal. she apologized, but it didn’t feel genuine — she just said she was “sorry i took it the wrong way.”

fast forward a couple of weeks, and natalie comes to me, asking if she can move in with me for a while because she’s having problems with her roommate. i thought about it for a second, and honestly, i just couldn’t do it. i told her no, and she was really upset, saying that we’ve always been there for each other and she didn’t understand why i was shutting her out now. i explained that i wasn’t comfortable having her stay at my place after what happened, and she’s now telling everyone that i’m being dramatic and holding a grudge.

i feel bad because i know she’s going through a tough time, but at the same time, i don’t think i’m being unreasonable in wanting some space.

so, am i the asshole for refusing to let her move in after she outed me?