So my wife just took a new position after being at home for around 3 years with our youngest son. This is with a manager she worked with when she was in college and trying to get in grad school. He is about 20 years older than us.

I have met him a few times and honestly I wasn’t a fan. These were professional events (vendor shows) and he was hammered/high and just seemed obnoxious. I really don’t appreciate the things he said to her back in the college days either. For example he would constantly joke with other guys in the phone that he couldn’t figure out if she wore thongs or regular panties. He always talked about his past infidelities and bragged about his wife taking him back etc.

Fast forward to now. She acts like none of that stuff happened before. She seems so worried about him being satisfied with her work or if he is upset at her about work issues etc. She seems to give him a pass for things she would condemn others for (she is very conservative). His other coworkers have made it clear he cheats on his wife and he really is a sleazy person.

AITAH or is this working/personal relationship have the potential to be toxic? Should I be worried he has other motives by hiring her? We got in a little fight about it last night and she thinks I’m jumping to conclusions about him and he would never cross a line with her.