I’m 26M and I’ve been seeing my fwb 24F for over three years.

I kept telling her I’m not interested in anything serious with her and that she isn’t really my type but I wouldn’t mind being fwbs with her because my attraction to her is only just physical. I never really cared about her because her personality sucks. She kept trying to discuss marriage. I said hell no to all those discussions. Last year, she lied to me about having an iud and I was stupid enough to believe her and not to use a condom with her. My son was born four months ago and I had no idea how crazy she really is after he was born. She’s so controlling and irrational. I’m pretty sure she’s unfit to be a mother. For example, the newborn is freezing in the cold with little clothes on and she’s afraid he’s going to get ‘overheated’ if we put a little more clothes on him in the fucking winter. She’d rather throw away brand new baby clothes in the trash instead of giving it away to charity or something. The list can go on and on but there is no room left to write here.

My fwb and I formally met each other three years ago. I had no idea we went to the same high school. This was before she got a nose job and completely changed her appearance. I didn’t know she existed when I was in high school. I recently found out from my mutual friends and former classmates that she had a deranged obsession with me since high school. They also told me stories of how she had a history of stalking other people as well and how she had serious mental health issues since kindergarten.

I’m afraid she’s going to use my son to keep stalking me and I’m definitely not interested in coparenting a child with a woman like her. I just don’t see the point especially if she’s going to have most of the custody because it’s definitely not going to be the child I raised and I’m not interested in having a child with two dads. I’d rather raise my son on my own without her in our lives. I can find a new mom for him.

I’ve only proposed three options. The first option is that I get full custody of my son and she pays me child support without ever seeing him again, so she doesn’t get any visitation rights. The second option is that she gets full custody of my son and I pay child support. I never see her again and he gets to decide if wants to see me again when he’s 18. The third option is to give him up for adoption.

Am I the asshole for proposing these options? I really don’t want to see her again. I’d rather convince the judge that she’s unfit to be a parent and get a restraining order against her. If the judge doesn’t agree to give me full custody and give her no visitation rights, I don’t mind paying her child support until he turns 18, so how am I a bad parent in this case if I haven’t financially neglected him? I just won’t show up at any events or be a part of his life when his mother still has custody of him. I will take him back if she doesn’t want to want to raise him anymore. Only if he’s 18 and he wants to see me again, I wouldn’t mind being a part of his life but I don’t want to be in the same room as his mom. For example, I’m not going to his wedding if she’s there too.