So there’s this guy (22m) I’ve (25f) known from church stuff for about six months. We’re around each other at events and volunteer stuff pretty often. A while ago, he asked me to grab lunch, and before we went I straight up asked him what his intentions were like, are we just hanging out as friends or is this something more? He said, “Just friends, I just want to get to know you better.” I even asked again just to be clear, and he stuck to the “just friends” answer.

We went to lunch, paid for ourselves, and it was fine. But after that, (over the next 3 week) things started getting weird.

He started blowing up my phone, like texting every day. He’d send random pictures of himself asking how he looked… which I didn’t respond to because it felt off. Then he started asking stuff like “Do you think I’m a good guy?” or “Are you thankful for me?” And I was like… we barely know each other… I told him that, and he got mad, saying I was mean or that I didn’t respect him. I wasn’t trying to be rude I was just being honest.

Then he’d turn around and apologize, saying stuff like “It’s all my fault, I don’t know why I act this way,” and lay on a ton of guilt. After that it’d be more compliments: “You’re amazing,” “I’m so thankful for you,” “You’re such a godly woman,” etc. It felt really intense and not at all like something a friend would say, so I asked again “Are you sure this is just a friendship?” Told him it was making me uncomfortable and felt like more than what we agreed on.

And during all this, I wasn’t even texting him back much. If I did, it was short like “lol” or “ok.” I even told him it was too much and that I wasn’t comfortable with how he was communicating. He said he’d chill out, but didn’t. So I just stopped replying altogether.

Then a few days ago he texts me saying, “Hey (my name), can we talk? I don’t know where this is going.” And I’m like… going?? You said this was just a friendship?? I reminded him of that and how I never gave any impression otherwise. He said he was “confused” and thought it might’ve been heading toward something more. Then he tells me we shouldn’t talk anymore and blocks me.

Alright. Cool. That’s your choice. I respected it.

Fast forward to today I’m helping out at a church event, setting up and he comes up to me like nothing happened. Says, “Hey, can we talk?” I told him, “Not really. You said you didn’t want to talk anymore, so I’m sticking with that.” He apologized and said he overreacted, but I told him I wasn’t comfortable talking to him.

Some people nearby heard the convo and now they’re saying I was rude and should’ve just heard him out. But like… I communicated my boundaries multiple times, he ignored them, guilt-tripped me, dumped a bunch of feelings on me while saying he only wanted to be friends, and then blocked me. Why am I the bad guy for not wanting to talk now?

So yeah… AITAH or just keeping my peace?