Throwaway to keep off my main, plus on phone

My (38M) and my wife (36F) have been together 8 years. Married 5. One kid (4F).

My mothers a functioning alcoholic. Has been since my dad died 6 years ago. She's not a bad person, but I wouldn't trust her with my kid solo. Soon as she finishes work the wines in her hand. If she knows we're coming round she doesn't til we leave.

My wife suddenly has issues with it. Hasn't for the last 3 years, but my mother drank at ours Xmas and since then she has. Says we should go NC. I disagree. My Mom drank 3 bottles of wine, excused herself and went to bed. No interaction with kids when drunk. No bad behaviour. Watched me, wife, BIL and sister play board games. Nothing negative

We've seen my mom 9 times since then. Driving to us or driving to her. Only Once has she drank. And that was a glass with dinner when out. I know she drinks when home, but she's good round the kid

Apparently for my wife that makes my mom a danger. She couldn't be there when needed.

So my wife has decided that we need to stop all contact with my mom. She's a risk. Showing bad habits. Untrustworthy. That bringing our daughter up round her is "approving alcoholism". I disagree

It's causing alot of arguments between us as I refuse to drop contact with my mom. AITAH?

Edit:- she Does NOT drink round my daughter, is never drunk round my daughter. We have never done over nights for my daughter at hers or even days solo

She's had small times (few hours while me and wife shop/appointments (second edit: WITH SIL)) In the day, and has been completely sober.

Ik it's a personal thing for her. When she's alone she drinks heavily. But she doesn't NEED to drink in the day. She still works 10-4. Doesn't drink through it or before it

I don't want it to seem like I'm making excuses. But apart from Xmas, she has never had more than one glass of wine around my kid