I’m here again because therapy is EXPENSIVE. Well a while ago I posted here about my oldest sister being kinda mentally sick, she “rescues” stray dogs -she only gives them a roof and some daily food. A few months ago she asked me to feed some of them, I don’t like being around her dogs because they are not trained and they saturate me mentally. It’s just too many dogs (20 at the time) barking all at once and it makes me uneasy. She insisted, so I said yes. I made a mistake and one of the big dogs ended up killing one of the small ones 😞😞😞😞 I didn’t found out until later at night thru my mom, it made me lose it, I felt horrible. My mom yelled at me because of my reaction, said it was too much drama. So I went with my friends for a couple of hours to calm down and be heard. Weeks passed and the same big dog killed other dog, my sister gave her away after that. A month ago she asked me to feed other 20 dogs she has in some land she owns. Today she told me that the door that keeps the dogs away from a fenced area broke and that she managed to temporarily get it fixed, that I had to be careful. So I went and I swear I was careful but one of the dogs came out, “its no big deal” i said to myself “keep it cool, just feed the others and calmly come back for this one” I did it but the dog wouldn’t come when I called him, so I took a closer look and he had dug out a dog corpse and was eating off of it, it looked like the one I had killed by mistake 😞😞😞 I lost it again but held myself together because I didn’t want to upset the dogs, I sobbed very loudly tbh. I put him with the others and left. I got in the car with my parents who come to pick me up and when we were a block away from my house I felt the need to tell my mom what had happened -BIG mistake. She was kind of understanding at first, but I kept getting agitated as I remembered my sisters words saying that I owed her a dog and that it was my fault. Then my dad just screamed at me to stop going and get over it. And I yelled back to stay out of it that I was taking with my mom, he almost slapped me and called me a stupid bitch. My mom said nothing -as usual - and so I just got into my room and cried -as usual- Fast forward a few hours later I hear my mom taking on the phone with my sister about how dramatic and crazy I am and my sister saying that it is not that hard to feed the dogs and stuff. I felt really betrayed by my mom because earlier I had felt somewhat seen by her, but I realized I wasn’t. It was stupid, I know, but I told her that I should’ve kept my mouth shut or just talk to my friends about it, and she said that if I ever disrespected her again she would hit me on the mouth. She has done so but when I was in middle school, now I’m freshly out of college. I KNOW I SHOULD BE OUT OF HERE, I just lost my job a month ago and haven’t been able to find a new one, I know that, I’m sorry. And well that’s it, so AITAH for talking that way to my parents??? Was it really that bad?