I (19F) broke up with a partner (22F) of 9 months, 6 months ago (I cant get over them yet). And we stayed acquaintances for another month before we abruptly cut eachother off. To be fair, and for more context, I was never the best partner and I can admit that our communication styles didn't get together well. I'm a distant avoidant, and they have an anxious communication style. I tend to be hotheaded, but try not to show it too much to them and keep it to myself too. I tend to keep things to myself when things get hard due to trauma responses, and they knew that and tried to help me.

At around 3 months in, our first argument was about their best friends, which was also their ex (who cheated on them), and I put down a boundary that I don't want to hear them talk about their best friend (we'll call them S) whom i also dislike. (It wasn't an immediate dislike towards S, it was a gradual thing that built up over time during the course of my 9 month relationship with my ex). They repeatedly told me they wanted to speak about them to me and how they want to share the happy moments along with the frustrating ones about S too. Of course, during the parts where they had arguments with S, or had fallen out for a bit, I'd listen to them rant or vent. I never wanted them to feel like they didn't have a place to vent, so I listened even though I already started to dislike S through the storied they told me. I didn't outright say that I disliked S due to the stories they told me about them because, at that point, I didn't know that was the reason.

So, at the end of the relationship, we got into a really big fight where we said things that really hurt each other. They used my chronic illness against me during the argument by saying I get sick, get hives and throw up whenever I hate someone. (Which isnt true, i just have severe allergies and bad health most of the time). They also mentioned how I was too traumatised and during the argument, they admitted that if they were in my shoes as a child, they wouldn't have ended up like me.

Both berated one another and at the end, i told them the truth about how I had already fallen out of love with them. After I said that, they blocked me. So, we cut each other off and blocked each other on all social media.

But they somehow convinced people I thought I was friends with to block me and ban me from servers I was in. Which, honestly made me really sad and caused me to spiral into depression, because they promised and said they would never include others into their personal problems and make it into a bigger problem. But they did make it into a bigger problem.

A couple of friends started to take sides and they made our friendgroup of around 12-13 people to break apart. I even heard from an ex-mutual friend (recently cut off ties with) that they've been ostracising me. And in some way, they also almost convinced one of my best friends to hate me too, telling her that I "hate" her or dramatised the things ive told them. (They have a history of dramatising things slightly to make sure people stay on their side)

In all honestly, I don't believe I deserved to be ostracised, but I really wished they could've at least let it be between them and just their best friend if they wanted to talk about it so much. I've cut off contact, blocked and haven't heard from at least 90% of the friendgroup now, and the last remaining one I still keep contact with, I doubt they still like me.

AITAH for saying I fell out of love with them?