I (21F) recently celebrated my 21st birthday- an overnight trip with some of my closest friends to a nearby resort. The plan was to do some swimming at the resort, then hangout around the city the next day- nothing too grand or extravagant since all my friends attending, (A (20M), N (20F) and V (19, soon to be 20F)) would still be under 21.

A bit of an explanation of my friends before getting into the story (it will help, trust me.) Me and V are childhood best friends. Me, A, and N became very close friends in school, but me and A became especially close- he is my best friend in the entire world now. V has always been very friendly to both A and N, however she only got very close with A less than a year ago.

Originally, I only planned on inviting A and V- they're both some of my closest friends, and they recently became good friends themselves. However, the more the two of them hung out together, I began noticing how much I cannot stand V when she's around A. She's always been a talkative person who gets extremely excited to talk about her various interests and hobbies, which I enjoy hearing about, since she usually lets me ramble about similar things. But for some reason, when she's around A, she only talks about herself- things she's done, thing's she's seen, people she's talked to- and if anyone starts talking about something else, she quickly redirects the conversation back to herself. A, being the laid back and casual person he is, enables her essentially, because he just nods along with whatever people say and do. Now, every hangout with them feels more like a TED Talk than a friendly gathering. At this point, it was too late to disinvite either of them, especially because V has been a long-term friend, and it'd raise eyebrows if she didn't get an invite. So my Plan B was to also invite N, who could serve as a buffer between us if V did get to be too much.

Time jump to the day of my party- we had arrived at the resort, and things went well for the majority of the first day. I did notice that V hung out with A way more than me or N, but it didn't bother me all that much, because if they did run off together, at least N was there to keep me company. But by the end of the night, N had fallen asleep, leaving me alone with A and V, and exactly what I expected happened- everytime we talked about something or tried to play a game, we always ended up in a rabbit hole about V's life.

The next day, the same thing happened, but I was slightly hungover, and far more irritable. V constantly tried to separate herself and A from the rest of us, and it was starting to really piss me off. I don't really put any blame on A since he really is just a down to Earth person who goes wherever the wind takes him- it was abundantly clear that V was purposefully taking advantage of this to remove him from the party to spend more one on one time with him.

So on our drive back home, I snapped- she had said something like "I have a crazy headache, the sound of my own voice makes me want to jump out of this car." Of course, she says this after refusing to let anyone else talk the entire trip, so I responded with "It sure doesn't sound like it." When she asked what I meant, I went off on her, telling her she's been acting rude and selfish the entire trip, and her constant need to dominate the conversation was annoying. I brought up how weird it was that she constantly dragged A away from me and N, and if she wanted to just be his friend, she could just say so. She got incredibly defensive and said she didn't do any of that. N agreed with me, saying she was acting weird with A now, and she did have a tendency to cut others off in conversation. A agreed that V did pull him away from the group a lot, but he didn't see anything wrong with it, and that he doesn't think she talks that much.

I haven't spoken to V since this- I recognize I could have been kinder with my phrasing and what I said was out of anger, but it was my 21st birthday party, and I felt like an outcast- if anything it felt like it was V's party, not mine. Me and A are still speaking, and he says he see's both of our arguments, but he also thinks I could have been more eloquent with what I said to her. He thinks she's just trying to be better friends with him, so he doesn't see what the big deal is. Now I feel a little bad, and perhaps I was going somewhat Bridezilla on my birthday and I was just upset it wasn't going my way. So, AITAH?