I f16 would like to mention that i haven’t actually told him anything yet because i’m low key kinda scared.

Basically a few months ago i had a “pregnancy scare” which wasn’t actually a scare at all. I tried to communicate with my now ex boyfriend that I was concerned that i had missed my period and was going to take a pregnancy test, he’s responded by saying i was dramatic and overreacting and that it wasn’t his problem. I took four pregnancy tests with two being positive and two negative so i decided to wait two weeks and retake one and while I waited i googled things that would cause me to have a miscarriage if i was pregnant. I found out i was pregnant because I did end up having a miscarriage.

Prior to this i was slowly realising that my bf was kind of a horrible person because he would pressure me into doing sexual things with him as-well as being incredibly racist to me as an asian woman. So that as-well as his reaction to my concern of pregnancy made me uncomfortable telling him about what happened, though I do regret not telling him at the time.

The past couple months have been rough i broke up with him after dating over a year in late January after switching medications for my bipolar which gave me a sort of clarity and confidence to do so. A few months after I was involved in a murder and had to visit a seperate trauma counsellor from my regular psychiatrist and a big topic we talk about are my consistent nightmares of the murder but i mentioned to her these dreams i have about the child i miscarried and the guilt i have about not telling the father. Basically she said most likely the only way to get rid of that guilt is to tell him the truth.

Now my big problem is that he has recently entered a new relationship and i don’t know how this information would affect that. So i want to know if i would be the ahole if i were to tell him after being no contact for three months.

Also i would like to apologise for any spelling or grammar mistakes i may of made in this english is not my first language :)