I (22M, India) hosted a family event at my house about two weeks ago. One of my friends (also 22M) was invited and ended up developing a crush on a girl who happened to be an acquaintance of my younger sister (19F).

I told him I’d try to help, but made it clear upfront that I didn’t want to involve my sister directly. My household is quite conservative, and things like this can easily create unnecessary drama. Still, to help him out, I gave him CCTV footage from our house so he could identify the girl — something I now realize was a serious breach of my family’s privacy, but he kept pestering me for it.

Now, here’s the thing — I don’t talk about love or relationships with my sister. It’s a mutual boundary we’ve always respected, for several reasons:

1. It’s just awkward between us.

2. She’s focused on building her career.

3. Our father is extremely strict when it comes to anything related to dating or relationships.

4. I see my sister as a kind, innocent person and I don’t feel comfortable involving her in my friends’ romantic pursuits — it just feels wrong.

Still, I tried to help him within my limits. I casually asked my sister for info and found out where the girl studies, though I couldn’t get her name (partly because I have a habit of teasing my sister about her friends, so she didn’t want to tell me). I even searched for the girl’s Instagram through mutual contacts but couldn’t find anything.

Despite this, my friend kept pressuring me to ask my sister for the girl’s number. I told him no — I personally hate when people give out my number without asking me first, so I’m not going to do that to someone else, let alone my sister. Plus, my sister doesn’t even know him — she’s only heard his name. She’d 100% make a fuss about it if I even brought it up, and I don’t blame her.

What made it worse is that this same friend once sent creepy, inappropriate messages to a girl back in high school and got rejected badly. Knowing that made me feel even more uncomfortable putting my sister or her friend in any situation that might turn sour.

Then came the real red flag — he asked for my sister’s phone number so that he could ask for it directly. I said no. I explained my reasons clearly, and told him it was a hard boundary. But he kept pushing for it and I said no multiple times . Today, when I refused once more, he accused me of trying to act like a “hero” or trying to seem cool and nothing else.

At that point, I didn’t even respond. I just cut the call.

So am I being an AH to him. Some of my friends are saying I shouldn’t have given him the CCTV footage in the first place, and maybe they’re right. But I genuinely tried to help him in every way I could without dragging my sister into it. I don’t think I owe anyone access to her personal life — especially someone she doesn't know.

Am I overreacting here for not giving him her number.