Throw away account Background: I (28f) and Husband (32m) have been married for 3 years. My husband has been previously married to someone let’s call Tara (31f). They share 2 kids (11, 8). I’ve heard horror stories about Tara from the minute I started dating my husband until a few weeks ago. How she is awful, psychotic, mean, takes advantage of everyone. So I’ve stayed pretty clear of her, only communicate when it’s about the kids, or at sports events. Recently, we’ve pushed passes awkward tension and have been able to get along. We share pics of the kids on each others time with them, offer to help when schedules get busy, so on. Lately, my husband and I have been in a rough patch. Arguments are more frequent, needing more space from each other. I’ve recently gone back to school, he’s promoted at work, and we have a 10 month old. ( yay sleep regression and teething!!) Well we had a big fight, and thought it was best we had space with each other, my husband went to stay at his parents house for the weekend to let things cool off and give us both time to recollect our thoughts. My MIL, decided that she was going to do our normal pick up routine with the shared kids. I told My husband no because they can be dropped off like normal, but he told me she insisted. A week went by, and we are finally starting to get on a positive end of things, couples therapy has really helped us. Until I found out that my MIL, went to Tara’s house and told her my husband I were separating and that I was crazy. Like being evaluated for a mental disorder crazy, and told her that she will be taking the kids on our time from now on, and that she “didn’t want to get in the middle of it and thought she needed to know.” And some other details. I found out from Tara after attending a school event for the kids. She wanted me to know that she was on my side, and that his mom did the same thing to her towards the end of their relationship, she painted her into a monster. She told me that she knows I love my husband but she wanted me to be aware of the things his mom was telling her behind my back. I called my husband bawling. Was furious and upset that he’s mom would do this to me, after all the years of showing her support for her grandkids, loving my husband through ups and downs, I get painted crazy? My husband called to confront his mom, and she completely lied to him. Saying the conversation never went past that we were “not in a good place and that’s why she was coming to get the kids”. Tara wouldn’t know certain details of his mom didn’t say them. I told him that I no longer trust his mom, I don’t want to be around her, I don’t want her help, and I sure as hell don’t want her in my house. He got upset because he thinks he should be able to ask her for help if he needs it (when I’m at school or working) and I told him absolutely not, we need a break from her. So Reddit AITAH for telling my husband WE need a break from his mom?