I come from a developing country (one of the poorest in Asia). I currently live in the UK.

I have issues in the workplace, though I keep my concerns to myself. For context, I work with people on low incomes e.g. people on benefits. I started out as a volunteer. I have a law degree (strong 2.1 from a highly ranked university) and I graduated 2 years ago, which probably adds to my angst.

1. I work full-time but many (not all) clients don't work even when they're capable of working. They just rely on benefits. What's frustrating is they earn more than me and spend a lot of their time complaining/throwing abuse. For example, a client has depression and anxiety and they send me and other staff members abusive emails because we couldn't help with their case against a golf club for (lawfully) terminating their membership due to arrears. I was reprimanded by the head manager for jokingly saying he should get a job instead of sending abusive emails since this was apparently ableist. A senior staff member agreed, saying if he could prance around a golf club and write abusive emails, they could work, and they haven't worked in at least the past decade. I was severely depressed and anxious during my degree due to covid, but I still pushed through and did my best. Largely because I had no choice and tuition fees cost a lot, but I still managed even when I couldn't. I didn't get a first but I got a decent grade.

2. I have been refused a good job because of my nationality and no corporation wants to sponsor my visa despite making it to the final stages, though they don't explicitly say this, but it's pretty obvious given the UK home office regulations tightening around migration. At university, I was subject to racist comments and attacks, but I never complained because there was nothing I could do to seek justice and it would be a waste of energy. I just pushed on.

A lot of the clients (NOT ALL) make petty complaints and use their disabilities to justify abusive behaviour (e.g. I have autism, so I can't help but yell at you). I was yelled at so loudly by a client (trans woman but has a very deep, loud, scary and threatening masculine voice) and when I asked them to lower their voice they kept raising it and spewing abuse at me. My anxiety was so heightened I could hear my heart beating so loudly in my chest and the blood rushing in my ears. This is the first time it happened with a client. It didn't get to me before but I feel like I can only take so much and I'm reaching my breaking point. Anyway, whilst they were yelling, I accidentally said "please lower your voice sir" in an effort to be firm, which I accept was my fault. I got pulled aside for being discriminatory. I explained that I couldn't think straight and used the proper pronouns at the beginning of the conversation when they were calm. It makes me angry because I feel like a punching bag for clients to take their frustration out on. Additionally, managers don't stand up for our welfare. Abusive clients just get sent a letter telling them that their behaviour is unacceptable, which they probably don't read and just bin.

Controversial opinion: I would like to note that a good 20% of clients have been through genuine hardship, and I enjoy helping them. Unfortunately the other 80% want to either cheat the system (I get a lot of benefit fraud inquiries) or are absolute assholes with petty complaints.

I'm frustrated because people back home are digging through bins to not die from starvation, homeless children try to make a living by selling goods on the streets and people with disabilities are forced to work because we don't have a benefits system. I understand that accidentally misgendering someone is discriminatory, but is there sufficient detriment? I'm not denying you your identity, I just made a simple mistake, and at the end of the day you got away with inducing an anxiety attack.

I'm so broken, battered, bruised and frustrated. I never imagined leaving my family and studying hard only to become a daycare worker for adults.