A few months ago I was under a lot of stress about money because I just moved into a new place without a steady income/job. I was also dealing with a lot of family issues and became pretty depressed. I only had time to see my girlfriend on the weekends. But she told me she couldn’t block every weekend off for me because she had to make time to see her friends too and she plays sports etc. She tried to discuss this with me often and looking back now I realize how much that was weighing on her. I couldn’t see her during the weekdays because I had class until the evenings and I’m pretty strict about my routine and sleep schedule. She cooked dinner for me a couple times during the week so I could come by after class so she could spend time with me. I thought this was a good plan but she started to say she couldn’t afford to keep buying extra food to make dinner for the both of us so I stopped going during the weekdays. It got to a point where even when I saw her on the weekends, I wasn’t present. She tried to communicate this with me several times but I’m not good at expressing my feelings and I have issues with communication. She knew about everything going on and she really did try to help me. But it was really weighing on her. Eventually she told me she doesn’t know what to do anymore, she feels exhausted and not valued by me, and maybe it was best that we take space/break up. I agreed and told her that space is all I needed and it wasn’t forever. I needed to figure it out on my own, but when I was ready I would let her know and we would pick things up again. She said ok at first but then after some weeks she told me that being in that limbo was hurting her. I wasn’t transparent and I knew I wanted to be with her but I just wasn’t ready and I didn’t know how to communicate that. She reached out again during our time apart and asked me where we stood, and by that point I guess I decided I was better off alone and I didn’t want to get back together. She said she was confused but I didn’t feel like I owed her an explanation. I told her we are just incompatible and our relationship was unsustainable and that she’s just not my person. Hearing that hurt her and she’s still hurting to this day. It’s been 3 months. I think about it from time to time. We still talk every once in a while, and I know she’s hurting. She’s mentioned to me that she’s confused by where she went wrong, if it was something she did. I don’t like when she asks me questions so I’ve set boundaries around that. She’s been going to therapy, but her being so sad breaks my heart a little bit.

Our relationship was just over a year. Everything was fine until I had all these issues come up all at once and I didn’t know how to handle it. She is a really great girl.

I blocked all of her social medias when we broke up. I don’t have any negative feelings toward her, I just couldn’t handle seeing them. She might think I’m cold or trying to erase her from my life for doing that, because I didn’t communicate that either.

I guess I’m just concerned about how it all ended. I hurt her and she likely will not want me back. I have a lot of trust issues from previous relationships and I don’t find it easy to open myself up to people. But I trusted her. I got along with her better than anyone. She has such a kind soul. Very giving and loyal to the people she loves. The dating scene isn’t great these days, and idk if I’ll ever find anyone like her. She’ll have no trouble finding someone who can give her what she deserves. But I feel like I’ve lost a good one.