Thanks for reading in advance

So new to Reddit, good source of info gave up all social media for 10 months.

44M married 9 years to who I thought was soul mate, best friend all the usual stuff but it really did feel great, we knew each other as teenagers & found each other later on.

We did everything together, enjoyed time on our own, around others were so strong together. 3 kids between us, none together after both had long term relationships, kids all grown up & leading their own lives happily.

Last 5 years moved to a place we love, brought a great house (nothing spectacular but perfect for us) plenty of spare cash to do stuff. Eating out loads, nights out together, 3 holidays a year, cars paid for, basically no worries. Without sounding cheesy needed nothing else & super strong, happy & would both tell others how great we were together.

Then just over a year ago maybe 15 months it all changed. Wife has become so distant (same age btw) won't let me near her, conversation has become very transactional is the best way to describe it. Now in separate bedrooms. We still talk, carry on with normal life but anything else is a real struggle.

She won't talk, Ive no idea what has happened, try to talk to her but get "I don't know why" back & have done every time. I've offered to give space, change, get professional help, basically do whatever she wants for us to work but still can't get a straight answer.

I really want us to work it out but getting very little back, keep asking what she wants, what should I do?

Is there any way back? We never argue but now very little interaction. I still think she's amazing. Definitely no infidelity happening from either side, 100% sure of that. We both have decent jobs we like which pay decent so no financial worries.

I speak to friends & they say I know someone that has gone through similar but it's so hard.

I don't know what to do, stick around & hope? Wait for her to decide what she wants? Or just call it a day, move away & start again?

I stress again, until this we were amazing, I think she's amazing but it's consuming my whole life & really affecting me & there is nothing else I think about every minute.

Be nice, I'm not one to share my life to the world! Just want serious thoughts from others.

Thanks.