I told my brother last night that he's dead to me. I (24F) hate my brother (32M). Well, hate is a strong word. He does not exist to me. For my entire upbringing, my brother has been a plague to my family. He went to jail in a different state, totaled my moms car, destroyed my bed once in a fit of rage, and he threatens to kill himself at least once a year. But that's not all. He also starts random conflict every few months within the family which makes any family gathering tense for no reason. He's always the victim. He ruined a family vacation once over an issue that didn't even involve him in the first place. He inserted himself into someone else's argument and then stormed out. He storms out of jobs when things get too hard. He even sends voicemails to my dad sometimes cursing him out for no reason. He talks shit about me behind my back. But still, everyone in my family enables him.

I haven't had a conversation with this brother since I was 16 despite seeing him at least once a year. We have no relationship whatsoever. The only way I hear about what he's up to is from my other siblings or my parents but I never actually ask how he is. They tell me about unnecessary conflicts he starts and immediately follow up with how they still have hope for him. If he goes a while without any issues they praise him for it. They praise him for the bare minimum. They say he's so loving, caring, funny, and charismatic if you just get to know him. I know him. He's not a good person. He hasn't been diagnosed with anything that could excuse his behavior. This is just how he is. So, last night we were sitting across the table from each other at a family dinner. He looked at me and asked, "How's your life?" This is the first time he's acknowledged me in years. I responded with a blank stare, "Don't waste your breath, you're dead to me." This did not go over well. Arguing, yelling, and then storming out. I quietly left after him. AITAH?