AITAH.... I f(55) have a friend (m 53) who I talked to a lot on line for a few years, he would get "frisky" and try to include me BUTTTTT no. A year or so in while inebriated he asked for my hand in marriage. I wanted to say yes but wanted him to make sure so I told him to ask me again when he was fully aware of what he was asking.

A few days later he calls me excited because in that few days he met someone and asked her to marry him. She told him yes but did not like that he would become inebriated and told him he was not allowed to anymore even though he was a happy, sleepy inebriate. She did not drink so he was not allowed to either. He could not stop so she would randomly kick him out and because of the distance between us I could not help him. He would either sleep in her vehicle or on the street.

She would let him back in the next day and all would be peachy between them until he was in that state again. They got married but this became a serious on/off thing and in between he would talk to me for solace. One of those times he asked me for help because she was screaming at him and he did not feel safe (I could hear her over the phone). I told him if he really wanted it I could get him a ride for the 15 hour trip and I would let him sleep on my sofa, but it was up to him. The next day his memory of the evening was skewed and to him I was the evil one for trying to help him get away. He went no contact with me.

This became a cycle between them, him drinking, her angry and him sleeping "out" or she would send him to rehab. In between he would contact me again. I was a sap and a shoulder to cry on and because I actually loved him but hid it I would talk to him again. Listen to his woes and try to be supportive. Never once talking ill of her or the situation. Cue her rants and his random "no contact" to me.

Through this whole time he would always tell me how much he loved me, respected me, and needed me in more ways than one.

Well we were again on good terms but last night he spilled the beans, he was seriously angry. While he was "getting help" for a few days a month ago, someone he trusted and knew the situation had contacted her. Was "chatting" her up trying to start an intimate relationship and only stopped when hubby was in the home again.

I have now on my terms gone "no contact" with him because it was ok for him to TRY to "chat me up" over and over even while married. It was not ok for someone else to try to "chat up" his wife. In his words his relationship with me was different than it was with her so of course he was going to be angry. I.E. its ok for him to cheat but not her. He was so angry he was willing to go to jail.

To me an emotional affair is the same as cheating, it was ok for him but not for her. When they met I defaulted to JUST a friend even though he tried for more. In my eyes it was not right.

So AITAH for finally blocking him and deleting the friendship when I know he is at a low point?