I already know I’m the AH in this - just needed to get it off my chest and some different perspectives.

My (25M) bestfriend (25M) has had a history of dating girls that were younger than him, most notably dating a 17 year old when he was 22/23. I’ve always hated this, brought up how I feel a few times but his defensive and explosive reactions to any form of criticism, even from friends, always un-motivated me to want to step in. This is trend of having to tread lightly around him has always been a thing for me and his other friends. As a result, i’ve realize i’ve slowly started to secretly resent him, and as much as I tried to consciously set it to the side and see through what I think his flaws are, they always eventually came up to the forefront of my mind.

Yesterday, we were on a party voice chat with two other friends (neither of them really knew this side of his dating habits) and we were bantering all night. The banter got a bit more intense between the friend and I, to the point where he said something along the lines of “you get no girls”. I know, shallow statement that doesnt mean anything and shouldn’t have rattled me, but i took it as an opportunity to hit him with “at least the girls I meet aren’t teenagers”. Long story short, he blew up and started spazzing on me, I turned it up a notch as well, and it turned into a heated argument with him angry that I would air out his business in front of people who didn’t know and betraying his trust, and me saying that I’ve held these feelings for a while now and have never found the chance to confront him about it without him turning it into a fight.

I know it wasn’t the best approach - doing it in front of people who didn’t know his business wasn’t right and a major AH move. The only thing that makes me think otherwise is how much grace someone with his dating habits should be entitled to? Like, yes maybe it’s legal, but it’s seriously questionable behavior that I can’t stand for as a man. I apologized about my impulsive attach on him the next day and cleared up my feelings and made it clear I don’t want to be his friend given his past behavior, and he’s still angry with me regarding how it all went down.