So my long term SO and I do not live together anymore. We tried for a few years but long and short, our blended families were a bit too much for the relationship and we were heading for splitsville. Also because I feel it's important to the narrative, he has aspergers and we've been together 6 years.

Fast forward 2 years and we've been working on communication, etc...and things are generally pretty good, but we live apart. My kids and I still go hang with him daily, his kids and I hang out when they're here either at my house or his (he has weekends with them), and while we don't share finances, for every other purpose we generally act married. (He calls me his wife, I refer to him ad my husband, we cook eachother food, go to the kids events together, etc...).

His mom and I had an incident that hurt her (and frankly my) feelings. My husband, behind my back, promised her one of our dogs. As soon as I found out, I said no and tried to find another dog. His mom and dad are millionaires, retired, etc.. there's no reason they can't get their own dog, but whatever. 6 months after I found out, he goes to visit his mom, and tells me if we're going to break up we might as well do it before his girls are back because he's bringing the dog there... I told him if he's serious about it I'm going to call the police for theft of property. I tried reasoning with the mom, but he has been telling her they're his dogs and he's been taking care of them. I'm not sure what else has been said by him, but she hung up on me. He ultimately didn't take the dog, but the girls also said they didn't want her to have them and so he blamed it on them.

Every spring break he goes with his kids to visit his out of state parents. I was included one time, but not again since we moved apart. I also don't talk to them and have only seen them maybe 5 times during our relationship.

There's a family wedding coming up. I know just his mom and dad. His mom's sister I met once. His mom doesn't even like hearing my name apparently, so I'm assuming I wasn't invited because of that. The issue I have is, as far as I know, I'm not invited by my husbands doing, not anyone else's, because thats historically been the case.

They have family that they really don't like; His mom's sisters husband cheated on her, left her with kids for years etc...but he's going and is generally accepted.

Here's the question: I don't want our relationship to end over this. I would probably not go in order to save him some grief, if he asked. But he didn't ask. He just didn't invite me. And this isn't an aspergers thing, it's a control thing. How upset should i be? Is it breakup worthy?

Tl:dr: family wedding coming up and husband didn't invite me.