I understand when I put it like that (the title) it does sound bad.

But hear me out.

I'm 23F and my fiancé is 25M. My brother is 28M.

My brother is an abrasive person to say the least.

I am East Asian and I only mention my ethnicity because I genuinely feel that some of this is a cultural issue, where my brother being the older male child, gets all the slack in the world. He is very much favored.

It was after we went to dinner with my family to celebrate my mom's birthday. My parents invited us back to their place (where my brother still lives at home). We went out to the backyard to take a family photo. My mom wanted to change her clothes first so she went to go do that. I don't remember where my dad was (probably on the toilet lol).

My fiancé, brother (obviously drunk), and myself were standing outside.

My brother received a dating app notification. It was loud and it was Grindr.

No one acknowledged it or cared, but my brother chose to make a comment. He said something like 'I'm just trying something new because I'm curious. You know how it is' and nudged my fiancé.

My fiancé raised a brow. My brother added 'being in the military and all, you experimented right?' My fiancé just replied with: "Wrong"

My brother then said something like 'You give off toxic top energy'.

My fiancé ignored the comment and I was just annoyed at this point so I replied: Who talks like that? What is wrong with you?

My brother then made a sudden gesture of raising his arm as if to hit me (backhand) and on instinct, I just flinched and closed my eyes. Unfortunately, my fiancé's instinct was to block my brother in that same moment and because my brother had drank quite a bit, he staggered backward into my dad's pond.

My brother has exaggerated the story in his favor and is now loudly boycotting my wedding (and has convinced my parents to do so as well) because I refuse to let my fiancé pay for my brother's expensive custom suit that is supposedly ruined beyond repair.

I am pretty sure he can just dry-clean it.

I love my parents but I'm sick of how blindly they back my brother up.

Am I being petty? My aunt told me to pick my battles, that this isn't a time to hold a grudge and I swear it's not wedding stress that's making me feel this way. I am just fed up with always having to absorb the damage while he gets coddled.