UPDATE for AITA for not inviting one girl to my daughters birthday party?

Well. As a first time poster and long time fan of this forum, that escalated quickly. I had to mute my notifications!

I genuinely did not expect my original post to blow up the way it did, I thought maybe a handful of people might respond - but wow.

The comments had me giggling, welling up, fist-pumping, and more importantly… standing my ground. I read every single take, and I have to say: you showed up. The solidarity, the theories (no I do not know if he's sleeping with her mum!) the sheer volume of support - better than therapy. (No shade to therapists)

The themes and perspectives shared were powerful. I feel like I'm not crazy and I've been listening to the wrong voices for too long.

Here's the update you all deserve:

NO. I will NOT be inviting the bully to my daughter’s party.

The collective hive mind gave me the nerve and clarity to say, “Actually, no, we’re not doing that,” to my ex-husband today. I’m protecting my girl, full stop. No more second-guessing. No more “maybe I’m overreacting.” No more guilt. Just a clear, calm mama bear doing what’s right.

Being a parent is hard. Co-parenting with a man who has a history of belittling my voice is harder. But this thread gave me strength I didn’t know I had. I won’t forget it.

I promise to update you all when my co-parent rears his AH face again. I'm sure it won't be long.

From the bottom of my 'permanently scared i'm doing the wrong thing' little mum heart, thank you.

Love from, a very empowered mum who knows she did the right thing.