A person who doesn't actively contact others has avoidant attachment. With this person, when you're together, the relationship is great, but if you don't make the first move to contact them, they won't initiate contact with you. This also includes their family; they rarely make calls to their family. If these two people have no daily interaction, they essentially become strangers, which is often referred to as avoidant attachment. On the surface, such a person seems to get along with everyone and can adapt anywhere, but deep down, they maintain a skeptical attitude toward others. They are unable to form deep connections with people. Why? Because when they were younger, they didn’t receive as much love and security as others. Either their parents were neglectful, or they were often criticized and belittled, which led them to become more independent, rational, and cold due to disappointment. Such individuals find it very difficult to develop a deep intimate relationship. If you want to form a close bond with them, it would take at least 10 to 8 years of friendship. However, once that bond is formed, they will become lifelong friends or partners. And logically, the closer the relationship, the more often they should initiate contact. But why, once separated, do they seem to disappear and never take the initiative to contact others? From a psychological perspective, there are two reasons for this. First, there is fusion anxiety. What is fusion anxiety? Simply put, they are afraid of establishing deep connections with others. Once the relationship becomes closer, they fear losing their personal integrity and independence. It’s important to understand that for someone with avoidant attachment, they likely received more criticism than love from their parents, which leads them to subconsciously believe that once a relationship becomes close, it will lead to hurt. This results in them, as adults, not being comfortable with intimacy. They feel that if two people get too close, merging their lives together, they will be consumed or hurt. This is why an avoidant person can handle long-distance relationships very well, but they can’t stand being with someone every day. The same goes for friendships; as long as you don't invade their personal space too much, the relationship remains relaxed and pleasant. But once you try to interfere too much with their life, they will become impatient or distant. This is not because they don’t care about the relationship but is a form of self-protection for their inner world. The second reason is separation anxiety. Don't think that avoidant people are cold or independent and don’t need emotional support. In fact, they have very strong separation anxiety, but it is subtle and inward. When faced with separation or sudden changes in intimate relationships, they feel fear and shut off their emotions to adapt quickly to the separation. Unlike anxious types, they won’t seek to argue with their partner or prepare for the separation in advance. For example, in intimate relationships, they rarely express emotional needs to their partner or try to form a deep emotional connection. Why? Because they fear rejection and fear that one day the relationship will end. So they suppress their emotional needs and try to become strong and independent, which is their way of resisting separation anxiety. So, you must understand that the reason avoidant people rarely initiate contact with family or friends is because it serves as a form of protection. If they contact someone too much, it may trigger their fusion or separation anxiety, bringing up deep-rooted pain of abandonment. Therefore, they try to maintain peace in their lives and avoid conflicts. If you have a friend who doesn't contact you for a long time, remember, it’s not that they don’t want to talk to you, they are just simply avoiding.