My (28f) cousin and I (25f) have always been really close—basically like sisters. We’ve grown up together, shared a ton of memories, and she’s been part of every major event in my life. I’ve also leaned on her in tough moments, and she’s done the same with me. But lately, our relationship has started to feel incredibly one-sided and draining.

She’s always been a bit intense about hanging out. Lately though, I’ve been needing more space. I realized I often don’t enjoy our time together because she tends to push her plans without really considering mine. If I try to suggest something else, she brushes it off. She wants to see me every single day, and when I try to set boundaries or say no, she pushes. If I don’t answer her calls, she reaches out to my mom or sister instead so she can get ahold of me. I’ve started lying just to get space, and even though I feel bad about it, it seems like the only way to get breathing room. People close to us have even commented that she sticks around me because I’m one of the few people who doesn’t say no, she’s gotten used to me always being available.

The bigger issue is her long-term relationship with a married man. I don’t agree with her relationship at all but I don’t think she knows that, even If I had mentioned that to her directly, I don’t think she cared. And I also hate how quickly she drops everything for him—even me. Recently, I invited her over for a barbecue with my family. She showed up late, barely stayed ten minutes, and left the second he called. But before she left, she asked me to lie for her so she could leave without suspicion. She made up a story about a friend getting in a car accident and asked me to back her up. And I did. I went along with it in front of my family, and I felt like crap afterward. To be fair, part of me thinks maybe she didn’t think it was such a big deal. We grew up covering for each other—teenage stuff like sneaking drinks, skipping class, or hiding boyfriends. So maybe she thought this was just another “cover for me” moment, the way we used to. But I also feel like this was different, we are not kids anymore and I feel like she is using me and pulling me into the lie made me feel sick.

After that, she ignored my parents’ follow-up calls (they were worried), and later texted me asking me to back her up and tell my parents to stop calling her cause she was busy handling the situation, when in reality, she was with her boyfriend. After all that, I snapped. I didn’t say anything—I ended up blocking her. I know that’s extreme, but I felt so disgusted with her behavior and needed space to figure out how I really feel about her and all of this. But now I feel guilty. We’ve been through so much together, and I don’t know if I’m overreacting or finally waking up to the fact that this relationship isn’t healthy.

I know I should’ve set boundaries earlier or been clearer about how uncomfortable I am with her relationship, but it’s hard when history and emotional ties are so deep. I’m realizing now that staying silent may have only enabled the dynamic, and I’m trying to figure out how to stop that without burning everything down.

WIBTA if I kept my distance from her or even cut off contact entirely?