I know the title sounds bad, but I'm really conflicted about this, so please hear me out.

My girlfriend (F24) and I (NB26 they/them) met in college and have been dating for just over a year. We don't live together, although we have talked about moving in together and we used to spend a lot of time together. It's been less and less over the last few months, and now I mainly see her on weekends.

Last year, she got a job in a field that she loved and was excited to do something she was passionate about. Unfortunately, the job was much more difficult than she expected and only got harder as she settled in and her higher ups began to pile more responsibilities onto her. It sounds like no one at her workplace is supportive or helpful, but I don't know if that's the truth or if it seems that way because she hasn't reached out to anyone, and I have no way of knowing without pressing the issue and upsetting her.

She was job hunting for a while, but she's given up after several months trying and being ghosted after several interviews. I understand that job hunting is stressful and I've tried to help where I can by searching Indeed and other sites for her and sending her postings, but she rarely, if ever, applies anymore.

She also has a difficult relationship with her family that she can't or won't try to fix. Her mother verbally berates her while her father and siblings stand around and let it happen, but she won't stand up for herself or let me step in. I don't want to get involved with her family business if she doesn't want me to (and she's made it very clear that she doesn't want me to) but I don't want to see her do this to herself either. No matter what her mother says to her, she still visits every other week to help around the house and get yelled out. She calls me crying afterwards every time. I do everything that I can to comfort her and I've offered to come with her, but like I said, she doesn't want me to get involved.

Ever since starting this job and moving into her own apartment (because she wanted to live on her own for a bit before moving in with me, which I can respect), she's gotten more and more depressed. We still talk daily even if we don't see each other as often as we used to (or as often as I'd like to) because she's so exhausted all the time. We still visit each other at least once a week and I try to plan date nights, but she isn't always up for them anymore. I'm positive that she isn't cheating or falling out of love; she's just depressed. She isn't interested in most of her hobbies anymore either, and spends most of her days off crying or watching Netflix if she isn't with me.

I've tried to help her. I've tried helping her find new jobs, I've offered to support her if she wants to quit (which wouldn't be ideal, but I could make it work for a little while), I've searched for therapists that take her insurance, but she won't do anything about her situation and there's only so much I can do. I feel terrible for even thinking about leaving her, especially since she mentions feeling suicidal several times a week (if not daily sometimes) and I'm afraid of what she would do if I left her. But I don't know how long I can take this. It's been going on for months and only seems to be getting worse.

Would I be the asshole if I broke up with her when she's at her lowest? Is there something I can do that I'm missing? Please help, I'm in over my head here.