Hello (: 30F here and 2026 bride. I am struggling with what to do about inviting my former stepdad (N) to my wedding. N and my mom got married when I was little and he basically was the dad that I deserved as my dad (D) was abusive and manipulative my entire childhood. I am now engaged to the love of my life 34M (C) and have begun planning for my fall 2026 wedding. I want to invite N has he did play a huge role in my life growing up and while we may not be super close anymore he is still the man that I will only ever truly consider as a dad. I spoke with my younger brothers to get their thoughts and feelings about me inviting him since they don't have the best relationship with their dad and they all 3 are okay with it. However, they really do not like their step mom (A) and would not want her there. I also do not want her there because I don't know her and I don't owe her anything. I also don't want to make my brothers feel uncomfortable. She was at our other brothers wedding a few weeks ago and watching her I just felt like she was trying too hard to be the center of attention. I know I need to discuss this with N before I actually send any save the dates or invites bc I need him to understand that if he does want to come then she is not invited and if she shows up they both will be asked to leave. Am I the a**hole if I don't want her at my wedding and say that if she shows up then they will both be asked to leave?