So I (25F) had the same friend group my entire life up until last year when some drama unfolded. Long story short, one of my friends from elementary school, Laila (23F), announced she was getting married, at what was supposed to be our nursing/grad dinner. She didn’t even tell us during dinner, but at the very end, while some girls were “taking photos” of us. Turns out, they were recording our reactions the whole time. I was completely shocked and thought it was a joke, but it was real.

A few weeks later, I found out almost everyone already knew, except for a few of us. This group is around 20 girls, and only about 6 of us were left out. In the video, some girls had their phones out before anything was even said, which felt so staged. Like, why are you announcing it just to a handful of people? We found out she told certain girls and asked them to keep it a secret. A few others found out through their parents, since her mom was apparently telling everyone.

I was so weirded out that I didn’t go to her graduation, and she didn’t come to mine. She already had a wedding date, dress picked out, and brought her fiancé to graduation. I’m convinced she only told us because he’d be there and she didn’t want us confused.

Eventually, I texted in the group chat saying what she did was weird and isolating, especially since even some of the girls she did tell felt bad and thanked me for saying something. Laila responded hours later in the most passive-aggressive way—basically a “f*ck you” without saying it. She said if we wanted to fix things or “pursue a friendship,” we should message her privately. I told her she was rude and entitled. Like, are you okay?

I haven’t spoken to her since and obviously didn’t go to her wedding. What’s wild is every girl who agreed with me is still friends with her. Meanwhile, me and a few others were left out.

One of the girls told me Laila was talking bad about me and lying, saying I bullied people and she “witnessed it.” I left all the group chats and distanced myself. I didn’t want to be associated with her anymore. They act so obsessed with her and it just cringes me out.

One of the girls she lied to—her sister told my sister there was a separate group chat where they called us “desperate” and said we were begging for Laila’s attention. Even the sister said it was weird, but guess who’s still besties with her? Just bizarre.

It’s strange they’d side with someone so manipulative. I’ve grown closer to the girls who were also left out.

And not even gonna lie, the girls she didn’t tell are the prettiest ones.

So… am I the asshole for seeing them all in such a bad light?