I (23f) got pregnant when I was only 16. My boyfriend (23m) and I were scared but we did quickly tell our families. At first our parents were pretty pissed. But they did come around. Mine grew a lot. Going from people who refused to let sex be discussed or safe sex be taught to the minors in their home to understanding the flaws in that.

When our daughter was born everyone was so happy and my boyfriend and I moved in together so we could raise her together. We were happy and our families were so close to our daughter. But we lost her when she was 2. It's a pain that never goes away and I'll be honest I still struggle with her death. I've gone to grief therapy and I have improved a lot. But I don't know that I'll ever be the same again or that I'll ever "get over it" or the many things people say.

My boyfriend and I made it through and we're stronger as a couple than ever. We also stayed close to our families.

This is where my mom's comments hurt. I'm the youngest in my family. And in the years since my daughter died both my siblings have become parents. My sister has two kids currently and my brother has one.

My sister's son was the first of the three living grandchildren and after my brother's son was born, my sister's son started being referred to as the oldest grandchild. It hurt to hear and I spoke up at the time and asked if maybe they could label him something else because he wasn't the first grandchild. My dad felt so bad that it happened and so did my siblings and mom said she did too. But sometimes there are still comments that leave out my daughter as a part of the family and I know she's dead and I understand not telling every single random person. But even during family parties or gatherings she gets left out. I have spoken up about it more than once.

The my mom wrote a post for my oldest nephew's birthday calling him the one who made her a grandma and it fucking crushed me. When I saw my mom I was mad and I asked why she would post those words. I asked how she could act like my daughter never existed. My mom told me to calm down and I was overreacting and that people knew about my daughter and would realize she misspoke. I pointed out how she misspeaks a lot. My dad asked what happened and I showed him the post. He told me it wouldn't happen again. I told him it keeps happening. Not just the post but it's like everyone wants to forget she existed and was a part of our family. I said mom posting about my nephew making her a grandma for everyone to see tells me she doesn't care. He told me he hadn't seen it, he was sorry and he'd be talking to mom and they'd all do better. My siblings said they never saw the post or they'd say something. And they have been good about correcting comments made and actually acknowledging my daughter.

But my mom is mad at me for being mad at her. She said I'm not being understanding of her grief and not letting her speak in a way that works for her. That I kicked up a fuss over a silly social media post.

AITA?