I broke up with my girlfriend. My partner would lie to me at times. I’ve never caught her on anything bad, but who knows at this point? She’s broken agreements we’ve had about smoking and drinking, saying we weren’t going to do them anymore. I’ve caught some beer and weed and confronted her about it, then denied it. It’s nothing awful and although she’s allowed to do those things, it upsets me that she lied about not doing those things, then caught her doing them. And then lied about how much. Just frustrating. The relationship had a pattern of lying. Friends tell me to get over it because it’s something small, but I can’t seem to do it. I ended up breaking things off because of the pattern of dismissiveness, lying, poor accountability, etc. the pattern of lying eventually eroded so much trust and I began to lose respect for her and exploding on her. Instead of leaving the relationship, i would scold her as a desperate attempt to get her to listen because i didn’t want to leave (not justifying my actions or words, but that’s what happened) There were great things about the relationship, but the foundation was difficult to build because i was not being met or reciprocated. At some point, i became resentful and awful to my partner, and im very ashamed, because i wanted and was a great partner for too long.