Using a burner to keep separate from my main, don’t come for my neck.

I (F22) decided to go on a night out with my friends over the Easter Break. I don’t tend to go out drinking often and very rarely go to clubs, maybe once every couple of months.

My parents are both in their 50s and don’t particularly like the idea that I drink at all, but know they can’t stop me. They’re quite conservative and have never liked my music taste, how I dress, the fact I have tattoos or the people I keep company with. They also aren’t thrilled with the fact I’m a lesbian, but accepted it. I wanted to come out to my extended family and family friends but they didn’t want me to and asked me to let them do it in THEIR own time, but I ignored this and I started telling people separately when I was ready.

Myself and my girlfriend went on this night out with a bunch of friends we’ve known for years. We’re all incredibly close and have been there for all the difficult moments in each other’s lives so far. They’re like family to me, but at the same time a big part of our relationship is playing dumb pranks on each other. It’s really stupid and ultimately we know it’s immature, but it always makes for really funny stories and memories to look back on. I’ve been both the instigator and victim in this many times over.

I made the mistake of not checking if my phone was charging while I was getting ready to go out and by the time I made it out the door, I realised I had less than 15% charge on my phone. A few hours later I was at the club and I needed to use the bathroom, I took my drink with me but accidentally forgot my phone. My girlfriend went for a cigarette so didn’t realise what happened while I was gone.

Essentially, my friends were drunken morons and decided to use my phone in order to take selfies. In my haste to get to the bathroom I must have forgotten to lock my screen, and this was all the kryptonite they needed. They went on to my Facebook page that I have for keeping in touch with some family etc, and posted a couple of admittedly rude things which, to anyone with common sense, obviously weren’t posted by me along with a few pictures of them all flipping off the camera while making silly faces. Thinking this would be hilarious - again they were very drunk - they acted like nothing was amiss the whole night, while somewhere between me getting back and checking my phone, it had died.

We left the club at around 4am, there had been no signal and my girlfriend noticed that she had over 20 missed calls from my parents. I immediately panicked thinking it would be something awful, but as it turned out they’d seen the posts and were trying to get in contact with me all night. Immediately I realised what must have happened and explained that the posts weren’t made by me and that I hadn’t seen anything because my phone had died.

They blew up at me, screaming at me down the phone, calling me stupid and irresponsible, and that they’d had messages from a couple of family members who’d seen it. They said it embarrassed them immensely and that they haven’t been this disgusted and ashamed of me since I blindsided them by telling friends and family I was gay without their knowledge. They said things were going to be changing at home, my friends would no longer be welcome in their house, my girlfriend was no longer welcome and I needed to make some real decisions about my life going forward because so far they’ve been lenient and this is what I repay them with.

I didn’t go home that night and the next morning I made a post on Facebook explaining what had happened and apologising to anyone who saw it. My friends felt terrible that they’d been so thoughtless and even offered to call my parents to explain it hadn’t been my fault and to take full responsibility.

When I got home I showed them the post I made and they said that wasn’t good enough, I would need to call those who contacted them and apologise over the phone. And that I was to apologise to them for ruining their Easter celebrations. I told them that I had apologised enough and asked if we could just move on from it even though I was really hurt by them, to which they said no and that they stand by what they said the night before. They also said they don’t understand how I can’t see how I act is affecting their lives and making them really depressed because they feel like they’re losing me.

I don’t know what to do anymore, I don’t think I’m in the wrong but I can’t tell anymore. AITA here?