This happened a month ago on a Friday. I honestly don’t even know how to start this properly. I (22F) have been in a relationship with my partner (24M) for a year. We had our anniversary on Friday, March 21st. We originally wanted to go on a getaway weekend together but things got in the way and we had to cancel.

We decided to do that another weekend, and then proceeded to spend the Friday with my best friend and her boyfriend. (No, we didn’t want to do something alone; we wanted to spend the Friday with them because we often hang out as a group and we would spend the whole Saturday and Sunday together and we really wanted to play Mario Kart with them.)

We ordered takeout as usual, chatted, played Mario Kart and had a drink or two, when my best friends boyfriend started making weird comments about me. For context, I do have his number but we have never spoken privately on WhatsApp or on the phone. We have a group chat with my boyfriend and best friend and that is our only communication. Also, they all know my password (I have nothing to hide on my phone and I don’t care if they look in it or not).

I think he is a nice guy, and we do talk together in the group, but we rarely interact privately or do pda. (Not even hugging when saying bye or hello). I only hugged him once at his birthday when my best friend was present. He started by commenting on my eyes. He thought my eyes were beautiful. He then complimented my weight loss. At that point my boyfriend asked him what’s going on and my best friend was completely confused and dumb strucked. He then doubled down and just said that he thought it was admirable how well I lost weight and that there’s nothing wrong complimenting that. I then told him that it very much is, he’s my best friends boyfriend first of all and secondly, I think it is weird and inappropriate to comment on someone’s body. (I lost weight with help of medication and I was overweight due to medical issues; I really don’t like it when people comment on my body, even if it’s positive. I simply don’t comment other body’s either. If it happens I usually do say thanks I don’t make a scene or anything but in this situation I did because it was inappropriate due to multiple reasons.)

Well, we left shortly after that because my best friend wanted to speak privately to him and he was continuing to talk BS. I called her the next morning to ask how things went and she accused me of ruining her relationship. I was like: what?

She proceeded to explain to me that after we left, her boyfriend continued to drink while they spoke and was commenting on how good I am as a girlfriend to my boyfriend. I know that our boyfriends talk on the phone from time to time because they like similar things like certain computer games and stuff like that and apparently, my boyfriend often talks about how lucky he is that I am so supportive and spoiling. I love gift giving it’s my love language but I also love physical touch and words of affirmation, well I just love love languages. But my boyfriend does the same for me, it’s not a one way ticket here. He literally bought me a 300$ gift for Halloween last year because I love Halloween so much. My best friend then cried and asked him what she did wrong? She doesn’t buy him as much as I buy for my boyfriend but that’s such a weird way of thinking, we’re all still young and I’m just in a better position due to my part time job but like, I personally don’t think materialism shouldn’t matter so much in a relationship. He then also said that my best friend doesn’t like to show affection so publicly but I know! That’s usually him turning it down and they proceeded to talk for more but it was mostly just him telling her she is a shitty girlfriend and that I am such a good and better girlfriend and gaslighting her that everything that was wrong in their relationship was because of her. She cried on the phone and I decided to “forget” her comment about me because I could obviously tell that she was super upset and asked her if i should pick her up and that I would take care of her. She then told me that she didn’t want to see me in the forseeable future. I was like, what? What the hell did I do wrong here? She then said that I ”sabotaged” her relationship and that it was my fault that her boyfriend started to dislike their relationship. I then started to cry on the phone because that girl has been my best friend since kindergarten. She then hung up on me and my boyfriend had to calm me down but ultimately I went to her house. She wasn’t there. I then wanted to go to his house but my boyfriend insisted on coming with me in case something’s going to happen. When we arrived he let us in and my best friend was crying and started screaming at me when she saw me. I tried to apologize (I don’t even know what i apologized for) and asked her if there was something I could do. She said I should leave her life for good and never contact her again. Then her boyfriend screamed at her for being so disrespectful to me and then i screamed at him for ruining our friendship. It ended up in all four of us screaming at each other (he insulted me then my boyfriend insulted him) then my boyfriend took me and we left. I cried for the rest of the weekend. My best friend blocked me on WhatsApp.

We went on the getaway a weekend later and it helped me calm down. my boyfriend posted pictures of us on instagram. I don’t use social media but my best friend saw it (through a fake account) and started insulting us on direct message. My boyfriend blocked the account.

On Monday, she came by in the evening (thank GOD my boyfriend was at my house when she came) because she proceeded to scream at me that I’m the reason her boyfriend cheated on her and now left her. She found messages between him and a girl on his phone on Saturday , then begged him to stop but he broke up with her and told her he needed “someone better”. I told her that it’s not my fault that he cheated, nor is it my fault that he broke up with her. He’s clearly an ass and she is a good person and a good girlfriend and she deserves better. She didn’t have it (i genuinely meant what i said; she wasn’t my best friend for no reason) and continued to insult me and tell me that i ruined her life. My boyfriend threw her out and I didn’t hear from her until Sunday, when she texted me again after unblocking me. We’re both Christian’s so I thought she might wanted to apologize and make amends because of Easter, but no, she insulted me again and demanded and apology. I told her I had nothing to apologize for and that I didn’t want her to continue talking to me unless she stops insulting me and making me the bad guy here. She then texted me one last time telling me I’m a b*tch and a horrible friend.

I honestly don’t think I’m the AH but maybe I’m just biased and see it differently because it’s my situation. She’s a good person. I’ve known her for so long and I know she’s just super hurt right know. I would like some outside perspective. What do you think?