my (24f) fiance (24m) was adopted at 3 & a half. his bio parents were drug addicts and CPS got involved and that was that. he has not seen his bio parents since then. 21 years ago.

a year ago, we found them on facebook. he decided to reach out, and him & his bio mother have been talking since. just texting, they haven't spoken on the phone. his bio dad hasn't talked to him yet. his mom just keeps saying he's in shock and what not.

next month, they are actually coming out here to meet him. i was open to this and supportive until i realized that the weekend that they chose to come out falls on a thursday to sunday. it just so happens that that thursday is her birthday and then sunday is mother's day.

i find it very ironic and not coincidental that she just so happens to plan this on a weekend that's literally all about her. i personally feel like it's selfish of her because my fiancé now feels obligated to get her gifts/pay for dinners. he says that he sees my point but he's also trying to defend it and say that it's a coincidence.

she literally texted me yesterday and said "the 8th is my day so i wanna go to this restaurant." and then this morning she texted him and was like "yeah it being Mother's Day on Sunday kind of puts a damper on the day because i know you guys will go see lexi's (me) mom."

umm? you haven't seen your son in 21 years because of the choices YOU guys made. and now you're trying to guilt him into being with you on mother's day like it's just another normal mother's day?

i can't get over that she planned this on her birthday & mothers day weekend.

ALSO- after he turned 18, she never tried to find him. it takes 5 seconds to look someone up on facebook. (they are well aware of his adoptive last name). she tried telling him that she searched for him but just couldn't find him and that's complete BS. they had from 18-23 to look for him / look him up online and they didn't. i don't feel okay about any of this.

tl;dr AITAH for thinking my fiancés bio parents are selfish for planning a trip to see us on a weekend that's all about her?