For context, my wife and I have been married for 13 years. She started doing a small farmer's market stand about 3 years ago. The first two years of this were stressful, but we never had trouble spending time together until this year. We have not had sex in like 4 or 5 weeks now because she has been super busy with getting her summer business up and running. The last time we spent any meaningful time together was two weeks ago (we went out on a date together instead of just sitting around watching TV- which is what she considers "spending time together" while I would rather go on a walk, play a board game together or something more involved than that most of the time). I'm trying to be patient and supportive of her but it's put a lot of stress on both of us and I kind of feel like spending time together is not as important to her as getting her business ready is.

When I approach her about this I am made to feel like the "bad guy" like I'm not supportive of her or that I don't care about her feelings. This absolutely kills me because I have stepped up to the plate every year so that she can prepare for and go attend her farmer's market stand- I take care of our son while she's working, I take care of her normal household responsibilities on top of mine all while working a full time job that requires me to work over time. I know people say stupid things when they're upset or stressed so I try not to let it get to me, but it really hurts coming from someone you love, you know?

Anyway, last night my wife and I were about to have sexy time. Things were heating up as we started kissing and suddenly she starts talking about our finances.

I do not want to talk about finances during sexy time. Generally I'm more of a listener than a talker in conversations so I listen, wait for her to finish what she's talking about respond to what she had to say and say these exact words:

"Honey, can we talk about something else?"

I'm not even trying to stop the conversation just so we can have sex. It's just the state of our finances really stresses me out and I thought we were having a romantic moment. She agrees but steps away from me. The mood was killed. We have a short conversation about something else and then she says she's gonna go to bed.

Confused, I asked her what happened, and she treats me like I was rude to her and then I get the cold shoulder from her and she goes to bed.

Before you ask, yes we have been to couples therapy/marriage counseling. A couple times actually. We were really close to getting a divorce a couple years ago but decided to go to therapy first to see if we could work it out. I thought we had learned a lot from the marriage counseling and things seemed to be getting better between the two of us but at the beginning of this year I don't know what's happened. I just don't' feel like I'm as important to her anymore- and I know I mentioned sex in this post, but it's not just about that, I really just want to spend more time with her and it doesn't seem like that's a priority to her.