hi, i've never posted on reddit before but i'm unsure what to do and need lots of advice. i am in high school, so i won't be revealing my age on here. as well, sorry if the times are vague. i don't want anyone finding this post that i know in real life.

i (F), broke up with my ex boyfriend around over a half of a year ago. we weren't on very good terms, and it got even worse when he came back and tried to apologize for the shitty way he broke up with me, but we ended up being on semi-good terms when i was trying to keep an open mind. this was maybe a month or two ago.

we ended up going no contact once again after i blocked him on one of my accounts on social media he had followed me on. i did this because we had started to sneak diss each other online for the other to see, and it was getting really bad. not only was he being very disrespectful but i knew that i was a bad person for feeding into it as well. i believed blocking him would be the final straw of him contacting me, and it mostly was, except for the fact i have a really good imagination.

my dreams have always been very very vivid, and i can describe most of them if i needed, in detail. the issue with this is the fact that he keeps showing up in them. i feel the need to clarify that i do not have feelings for him anymore, as he hurt me deeply and i have more aggression than love toward him (also something i have to work on). i hate dreaming about him because i wake up angry, and it ruins a lot of my day. i don't know how to fix this.

as well, i had blocked him on my main. this is 1/3 of my accounts on a specific social i like to stalk him on, where he is most active. i had ended up finally going through with it and blocking him on 2/3 accounts, but i cannot seem to block him on the third. i keep looking at the pictures he posts and getting angry whenever i see his face.

i hate feeling mad or upset because it is my worst emotion- i always end up feeling like i need to scream or hit something. i don't know how to solve this, and i don't know why this could be happening. any help would be appreciated.