I feel like I’m still processing everything, but I can’t keep this inside anymore. I ended a long-term friendship recently, and it’s breaking me. I’ve been fighting with myself over it for so long, trying to find any reason to stay, any way to fix things, but I just couldn’t anymore.

We were really close for years. They were like family to me. But over time, things changed. I started to feel like I was putting in all the effort to keep the friendship alive, but they weren’t meeting me halfway. They were selfish, always making things about themselves, always distracted — and honestly, it hurt.

What really broke me was when they started using people’s vulnerabilities against them during arguments. It wasn’t just a one-time thing either. I saw them do it to a close friend, using her personal struggles like ammo in a fight. And I thought, If they can do that to her, what’s stopping them from doing it to me?

It made me realize that I couldn’t trust them anymore, and that trust is something I don’t just give away. When I finally told them how I felt, it wasn’t easy. I told them it wasn’t just one thing, it was a pattern. I had to let them go for my own peace, for my own growth. I couldn’t keep letting someone drag me down when they didn’t even care about changing.

They told me it was clear the friendship “never meant anything” to me, which hit me like a punch to the gut. Because if it didn’t mean anything, I would’ve walked away a long time ago. But I stayed, hoping things would get better. I loved them like a sibling, and that’s what makes this so painful.

Their parent had also reached out, apologizing for their behavior, saying they knew their kid had issues with anger and saying it runs in the family. It was like hearing, This isn’t just a one-time mistake — it’s a pattern that’s deep-rooted. And that just hit even harder.

So, I let them go. I had to. And I hate myself for it. I wish things had worked out. But I can’t keep holding onto something that’s only hurting me. I can’t keep putting myself second. AITAH?

If anyone else has been in a similar situation, where you had to let go of someone you truly cared about — how did you move on? How do you stop thinking about all the good times and wondering if you made the right choice? Because right now, I’m struggling with it all.

Thanks for listening.