M(35) kinda dating a coworker F(27), we were friends outside of work for 5 years (she wasn't working at the time and she asked me out). And started kinda dating we kissed and talked but hadnt had sex yet. But we had great Chemistry, she told how she had problem letting people in but that she felt safe going out with me.

She came back to work as a temp for 20 days, I am not her superior not can I fire her or anything but I am in a upper schelon in the company we work for.

I asked her out again and she told me she had period cramps but if we could postpone to that Saturday. No problem, I said, and Saturday (we texted and chatted) I asked again and she said if we could wait until she ended her contract (10 more days) I was disappointed but thought maybe she didn't wanna get rumors going or something so we keep chatting at work flitirng a litle between each other.

But on after he last day a coworker, a friend, came to me and told me "yeah you shouldn't try anything with her, last night there she went home with another dude from work and had sex. Surely she was just stringing you along to not lose her job (I can't make that happen and told her so a long time ago, we are different areas). I know this is his opinion but this touched me on all my insecurities.

So I confronted her. I ask her why she wanted to "wait until she finished her contract" and she said thats because she didn't want people to talk and I answered well too late for that because everyone was talking about how she fuck X dude And was playing nice to me to not "lose a job", I was sad, hurt and humiliated that she felt the needed to string me along because she feared being fired that we known each other for five years enough to know I would fire her for something like that. She replied that we weren't anything exclusive and I answered that it wasn't because she sleep with anyone else but that she choose a coworker, that she told me to wait for her so people won't talk but she didn't mind people talking about how she opened her legs for that other dude. But what hurt me is the idea of her stringing me along for a fear of loosing a shitty job, lying to me instead of being forwarand like telling me "she didn't want to see me anymore" then I snapped and said "if you wanted a job so much, go to the red light district wait for a car to stop, think of X dude and open your legs at least you get paid this time" she started crying and I left.

I lost my temper, the idea of being used by someone who was a friend and maybe more hurt me, made me feel humilliated and angry. And I realized I just wanted her to feel as hurt as she hurt me.

IATA for snapping like that