so backstory, i live with my grandmother but she still thinks my mom is a good mom and is on her side about a lot of things even though she knows all the things my mother has done, i would prefer to not get into the specifics but last year she was taking my siblings out to go to expensive vacations, amusement parks, concerts ect and leaving me out so i had a conversation with her and told her it hurt me and it pretty much turned into her gaslighting & guilt tripping me but it ended in her saying maybe she would do something one on one with me for my birthday and i said okay. ( keep in mind this conversation last only 5 minutes and was had almost a year ago now. ) my 18th birthday is in 4 months and my mother brought it back up to me and asked what i wanted to do for my birthday, i told her i honestly just wanted to go to an amusement park with my girlfriend ( who i’ve been with for over 2 years ) and spend time with her and then apparently she decided to go behind my back and create a sob story to my grandmother about how i don’t wanna spend my birthday with her. which then turned into my grandma kind of guilt tripping me and making me feel like i have to which i find baffling because it’s MY birthday and i feel like i should do whatever would make me happy, also i feel like it’s unheard of for someone to want to spend their 18th birthday with their mother, especially if she’s a horrible one. it’s honestly overwhelming me and making me feel like i’m the bad guy for it. my grandma told me maybe i could do something with both but i truly don’t want to, ive made enough sacrifices and done things that i don’t want to, to make other people happy but i don’t feel like it’s fair to me to do that for my birthday. when my mother brought it up to me i tried to nicely say no but now it’s turning into a whole thing and no matter what i decide i still have to live with my grandmother and am afraid her opinions on the situation will turn into a issue within the house. keep in mind my grandmother has a temper and is a judgmental woman but it’s better than living with my mother. anyways, let me know. AITAH?