I (25F) have been dating my boyfriend (27M) for about a year. Things have been mostly great… until I recently saw something that totally threw me.

He left his phone unlocked while showering, and I noticed a Notes app notification pop up. I glanced, and the title of the note literally said “Backup Girls.” Curiosity got the better of me — and yes, I opened it.

Inside were three names, all women, with little descriptions like:

“Fun, flirty, would say yes”
“Still likes me — probably”
“Could work if she’s still single”

I recognized one of the names — someone he used to flirt with before we were exclusive.

So yeah, I got mad. But instead of confronting him directly, I did something petty: I messaged that girl from a burner account and basically asked (nicely) if she was still into him — said I was "a friend" just curious. She replied and said she hadn’t talked to him in months and was confused why I was asking.

Now I feel kind of gross. I did snoop. I did make a fake account. And I am keeping it all to myself like some soap opera villain.

But at the same time — is it really snooping if the guy’s keeping a literal list of backup girls in case our relationship fails?

So… AITAH?