I 30F and my fiancée 31 M recently had our baby and fiancée got a promotion at work at the same time. It's been a challenging time because baby was feeling every 30 min to 1 hour for the first almmost 6 weeks of his life.

At the beginning fiancee would take him out for walks once he was coming home so I can have a quick nap. He would take our dog out and prepare dinner.

Recently he flew my mom over so I can have company and help during the day. Due to his new promotion he leaves the house around 3.30am and depending of his workload comes back around 2 - 3pm and things were getting a bit too much (I have also a postpartum depression). We got into an argument the other day because he noticed I was upset and asked what's wrong. I said initially I don't think it will be a good idea to talk about it because he will not like what I want to say, but he insisted so I've told him. I said I don't think it's ok for him to come home, play on his computer, go to the gym and spend 1 or 2 hours with us at night and my mom being here should not replace him being present. I told him how I was upset that for my bday he spent the day assemblying our new bed and only thing we did was go for a late lunch and next day for my first mother's day he spent his day playing on his computer and came downstairs and proposed to go for a walk late in the day and got just a card. I am not materialistic and I didn't wanted anything extra for any of those days. All I wanted was for him to spend the day with me/us. His exchuse was that he didn't thought I was celebrating mother's day here ( in our country mother's day is celebrated at the beginning of March) and the bed he assembled it for me to have a better sleep and didn't wanted to wait until the following week to do it. He also said that I need to understand things are hard and different for him too and he needs to do something to relax. He doesn't understand why playing his game for an hour and then going to the gym is a problem. I said that the problem is not the fact that he wants to relax, but I don't think it's ok to do both on the same day. It's either one or the other. If he wants to play his game then he can't also go to the gym because by the time he is back, we can go for a short walk, eat and it's bed time. There is barely any time he spends with us. He got very upset and doesn't speak to me much since. We have been sleeping in separate rooms on the days he's working since his new promotion which makes me feel very lonly nduring the nights. The nights before he's off even if he doesn't wake up when baby cries, it feels better just because he's there.

So..was I the Ahole for asking him to chose one or the other and not do both on the same day?