I (ftm, 24), am part of my college's socialist club, and I have a lot of friends and acquaintances who are part of the club. However recently there has been some drama involving one of the members who for the sake of this post we'll call Adam. Who is in danger of getting kicked out of the club, the main reason being that he took a picture of someone's laptop screen as blackmail. I first heard about it this past Thursday from my friend who we'll call Johnny. For reference purposes, Johnny is a freshman and he's just started making friends in the club, so he doesn't know everyone THAT well.

The story that Johnny told me is that apparently, Adam tried to start a coup against the club because he just had beef with the officers and that he had an entire group chat called "the plan", where he involved a lot of club members including one of my closest friends who for the sake of this post we'll call Mena.

On Saturday, me, Johnny, and two of my childhood friends decided to go to an event at this arcade, and during that hangout, Johnny told me that he ran into Adam earlier in the day, he told my friends the story, and then he added that earlier in the day he ran into Adam who denied everything and claimed he could explain it. When Johnny asked him for said explanation Adam got upset and and dodged the question, and then later on the day, Adam apologized through text for lying. Johnny brought up that he feels really bad for our friend whom we'll call Alan, because he's good friends with Adam, and based on the way he acts around him, we have all hypothesized he has a crush on him. We all concluded that it would be better for Alan to hear about Adam getting kicked out from a friend rather than during the club, we also concluded that since I've known Alan the longest, it would be my responsibility to break the news to him.

I figured it was for the best to rip the bandage so I broke the news to him through text, Alan didn't seem to upset, and he thanked me for letting him know.

Anyways so today I ran into Mena and I asked her about it because I didn't want to think that she would be part of a coup. The story that Mena told me was different, she told me that while it is true that Adam DID take a picture of the president's laptop, what he found was the fact that the club president was slandering him to someone else, she also told me that the group chat "The Plan" was not a coup, but rather Adam bringing people together who were dissatisfied with the way that the club was being run, and they wanted to reform the club's constitution, but first they needed to get the club president voted out and replaced with Adam, and that the picture wasn't blackmail but rather he was gonna use it to expose the club president during his campaign.

She told me that while she didn't agree with Adam's method of invading the president's privacy like that, there was never any coup. She also explained that this fallout has caused Adam to become paranoid which is why he probably lied to Johnny and why he's been acting out.

Now some time has passed and I remember that text conversation with Alan, and I think about how he and the rest of my friends only have one side of the story. My conscience is catching up to me, I know I'm nosy but I don't consider myself the gossiping type, considering how my bullies would spread rumors about me. I remember Mena's words about how Adam's been acting out because he's paranoid, and I think of all the times in high school that I did things I'm certainly not proud of because I was paranoid because of rumors that were passed around about me, or because of times my words were twisted and then moved around school, and now I feel bad that I may have contributed to that.

Don't get me wrong I certainly do feel like everyone in this case is an asshole (except for Mena, and Johnny), but now I feel bad for jumping the gun and telling Alan the story when I've only heard about it from Johnny who didn't even know until he heard about it from the officers. I potentially hurt Alan's feelings and made him feel betrayed without knowing the story from all angles.

Anyways Reddit, what is your judgment, Am I The Asshole?